


Our Song

by bilgegungoren00



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), Once Upon a Time (TV), Supergirl (TV 2015), The Flash (TV 2014)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-24
Updated: 2016-11-08
Packaged: 2018-07-18 01:25:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 39,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7293799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bilgegungoren00/pseuds/bilgegungoren00
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I grabbed a pen<br/>And an old napkin</p><p>And I wrote down our song...</p><p>Basically, one shots based on songs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Way I Loved You - Snowbarry

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Here's the first chapter of my new idea. So it'll basically be one shots inspired by songs. It will mostly be couples in the description, though I really feel like it I might use another couple. I hope you enjoy this first one!
> 
> Song: The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift  
> TV Show: The Flash  
> Fandom: Snowbarry (Barry&Caitlin)
> 
> P.s.: The story takes place after season two, however Barry's father is still alive and he didn't go back in time to save his mother.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the team defeated Zoom, Barry's life has been getting better, or so he thought. He had everything he wanted. He was still the Flash, his mother's killer was dead, his father was out of prison and he had Iris. But what if what he used to wants isn't what makes him happy?

_[She's] close to my mother_  
_Talks business with my father_  
_[She's] charming and endearing  
_ _And I'm comfortable_

_\-----_

_[She] can't see the smile I'm faking_  
_And my heart's not breaking  
_ _Cause I'm not feeling anything at all_

* * *

 

For his whole life, Barry Allen was sure of three things: One, he’d find who murdered his mother. Two, he’d get his dad out of prison. And three, he was in love with Iris West. Those three things were what kept him going, even when his life become unbearable. For years, he’d searched for a way to find the impossible, prove the existence of the man in the lightning, and pining over Iris from afar. However, those three things had changed the moment he became the Flash.

After the dark matter from the particle accelerator explosion hit him, he finally realized that there was much more in life than just those three thoughts. He’d met two of the best friends of his life. He’d found the man who murdered his mother. He’d gotten his dad out of prison. But of course, he’d done a lot more than that. He’d saved his city from criminals more times than anyone could count. He’d become their hero, their light, their inspiration. He’d become their shield from the world he didn’t understand. And he loved it. He loved every moment of it.

And of course, he’d finally gotten the chance to be with Iris.

After they defeated Zoom, Barry had finally been able to move on from his mother’s death with the help of his friends, his two fathers and of course, Iris. For the last few months, everything had been perfect. Maybe a little too perfect, though.

Sitting alone in the cortex of S.T.A.R Labs, Barry stared at the screen in front of him. There wasn’t anything particular on them, but it helped him think. Lately, he’d started to come here at nights more and more often to be alone, and to think about what he was doing with his life, really. He’d spent more than ten years chasing after impossible, meaning he basically did nothing interesting with his life. And right now, he felt exactly the same, even though there was actually nothing wrong. He seemingly had everything he wanted.

So why had he bailed on his date with Iris, telling her he was tired with all the metahuman chasing, and he just needed some time to relax? Iris, of course, had said yes immediately, and told him they could just go out tomorrow. The idea didn’t interest him any more than the date did. In fact, he was so deep in thoughts that he didn’t hear the familiar click of high heels coming in the cortex, indicating Caitlin was there as well.

“Barry?” Caitlin asked as she entered. Startled, Barry turned around to face the scientist. His heart skipped a beat. As much as he felt bad to admit, the best part of his days were the times he spent here, in the lab, with Cisco and… And Caitlin. Mostly Caitlin. He didn’t know how it happened, or why, but every time Caitlin was around, his senses came alive, his heart stuttered, he seemed to lose his ability so speak properly, and he ended up blushing. Every little touch, accidental or knowing, every time Caitlin patched him up, every time they were side by side, their shoulders bumping at each others, his heart started to pound two times faster than normal— _his_ normal. The times he spent with Caitlin… Those were the only times he didn’t have to fake his smile. The other times, with Iris, with Joe, with his father, it always felt like he smiled because they expected him to smile and be happy. _What more could I ask for my son_ , his father had told him once. Sometimes, he thought that too. What more could he ask for? It’d be selfish.

However, he was far away from being happy with what he had.

“What are you doing here?” Caitlin asked, walking slowly to the seat next to him. Barry sighed, twisting the coffee cup in his hand. “I thought you had a date with Iris.” Of course. Everyone knew he had a date with Iris. Everyone knew everything about him and Iris. At first, it was amazing, a whirlwind of emotions and excitement and the elation of finally getting what he wanted, but then the reality had set in. Iris was perfect for him, that was what everyone said, but he had wanted her for so long that he hadn’t realized that he didn’t actually love her anymore, he just loved the idea of having her after all that time. He hadn’t admitted those feelings to anyone before, though.

“I did,” he said finally, deciding it was pointless hiding something from Caitlin. She’d understand him. At least that was what he told himself. Maybe Joe, Henry, or even Cisco wouldn’t, but she would. And he desperately needed to tell someone. “I bailed,” he confessed, leaning forward. Caitlin’s brows shot up as she narrowed her eyes.

“You bailed?” Taking a deep breath, Barry nodded. Caitlin eyes her suspiciously. “Are you sure that metahuman didn’t mess with your head?” He shot Caitlin a look, making her back up. “I’m sorry,” she apologized immediately. “I just assumed… I mean, I assumed you were happy.” Barry rolled his eyes.

“Everyone seems to assume that, or expect that,” he muttered under his breath. He could feel Caitlin’s eyes on him. He expected to see a judgy look in her eyes, but they were full of understanding. His heart fluttered again as he continued. “I mean, I have the perfect life, right? I got all I wanted. I found my mom’s killer. I got my dad back. I have Iris. I defeated the Reverse Flash and Zoom, and things are finally settling down. It’s almost like I’m _supposed_ to be happy.” Running his fingers through his hair, he turned his eyes back to Caitlin. “You probably think I’m selfish or something.”

“No,” Caitlin said softly, putting her hand on Barry’s knee. Barry’s heartbeat quickened with just her small touch, and even though he was wearing pants, he could feel it. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his heart. This was meaningless. Wrong. He was with Iris. He was supposed to be with Iris. “Not being happy doesn’t make you selfish, Barry. It’s perfectly normal.” She took a deep breath. “But why? Haven’t you always wanted her?”

“I did,” Barry admitted. “And maybe at some point I was in love with her, but lately it feels like… I mean, we’re together on Earth 2 and in the future, which made me happy once. But now, it feels forced. Does that make sense?” For Barry’s surprise, there was an understanding smile on Caitlin’s face.

“It does, and Barry, there’s nothing wrong with it, if you don’t keep acting like everything is okay.” Barry knitted his brows.

“What do you mean?” Caitlin stood up, squeezing Barry’s shoulder.

“Stop acting like everything is okay. Tell Iris. I won’t say everything will turn out to be better, but it’s better than stalling Iris if you don’t really want it.” Caitlin smiled at her. “And go home. You’re tired. We both are, actually.” Barry nodded. She was right. He was tired. Not just physically, but emotionally. The last few weeks had been hard, pretending he was in love with someone he actually wasn’t. He wanted a break.

As Caitlin turned to leave, he suddenly stood up. “Caitlin?” Caitlin stopped, turning around. Gathering up his courage, he straightened his shoulders. “When this is over, if you’re available as well… Would you like to get dinner some time? Or a drink? Of course, if it’s okay for you.” He expected Caitlin to laugh at him, but instead her smile widened, making Barry’s heart squeeze in the best way.

“I would like that.”


	2. Love Will Keep Us Together - Captain Canary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After losing Leonard, Sara tries to cope with his death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> I swear when I got this request from AgentMaryMargaretSkitz, I would do it a fluff piece, full of happy and sweet and cute moments we couldn't get from this couple. However, this scenario somehow just stuck in my head, and I'd found myself writing something that literally brought tears to my eyes once or twice. So you've been warned, it might hurt a bit! Enjoy :)
> 
> Song: Love Will Keep Us Together by Neil Sedaka  
> TV Show: DC's Legends of Tomorrow  
> Fandom: Captain Canary (Sara&Leonard)
> 
> WARNING: It takes place after season 1 episode 15, and if you haven't watched it yet it contains a HUGE spoiler, just FYI. (If you haven't watched it, thought, DO IT because it was an amazing yet heartbreaking episode.)

_Love, love will keep us together_  
Think of me, babe, whenever  
Some sweet-talkin' guy comes along  
Singin' his song  
Don't mess around, you gotta be strong

* * *

 

The beer in her hand tasted bitter. The music rumbling in the club was so horrible and loud that a part of her wanted to either shut her ears or go find some place else to drink. The bar stool was incredibly uncomfortable. Yet, still, she was there, drinking her second bottle of beer, thinking about the only thing she seemed to be able to think about for the last week.

Leonard Snart. Aka Captain Cold. Former thief, criminal, and a guy that she was pretty sure her father would never approve if he knew about the thing that was going on between them. _Had been going on_ , she corrected herself, shutting her eyes in pain. In fact, being a detective, there was a good chance he’d throw Leonard’s ass to a jail.

However, his father hadn’t seen the way Leonard changed, right in front of Sara’s eyes. He really had been a cold-blooded criminal, and it would have been a stretch to call him good. Yet, he’d sacrificed so much for the team. He never abandoned them. When Sara was about to kill Stein, he was the one that stopped her. When Mick asked him to join the time pirates, Leonard had protected her and hadn’t betrayed the team. When… When the Oculus was going to blow up, he selflessly volunteered to sacrifice himself for Mick. He hadn’t even hesitated. He was a hero in the end, and that was all that mattered. That should be all that mattered. But Sara knew, selfishly, she’d do unimaginable, probably very un-heroic things to get him back.

Not that she could do something about it.

Taking a deep breath, she twisted the ring around her finger. His ring. She hadn’t been able to take it off. She doubted she ever would.

Leonard’s words rang in her ears once again, just like it did maybe a hundred times. _It’s being on this ship, travelling through time, starting to wonder what the future might hold for me. And you. And you and me._

He wanted a future with her. Of course she, being her closed off self, mocked him, saying he should be one hell of a thief to steal a kiss from her. To be honest, though, even then he’d stolen her heart, even if she didn’t want to admit.

And now she’d never get the chance. She’d never get the chance to tell him how she truly felt about him, how she wanted a future with him too, how she… How much she loved him. He was gone, and he wasn’t coming back.

“Hey, beautiful.” With the gruff voice coming from her right, she glanced at the guy that had just sat down next to her. She almost wanted to grimace. The guy smelled terrible, and that would probably be a compliment to his smell. His hair wasn’t combed, his beard was messy and he had a bourbon bottle in his hand, half empty. Sara briefly wondered if he had drank it all. She really hoped he hadn’t, for his _and_ her sake.

“Hey,” Sara said briefly, finishing her beer, getting ready to leave. She wasn’t drunk yet, a little buzzed maybe, but she didn’t want to spend another second in that bar, contemplating on the past. She had to move on.

“Wait, wait, wait. Where are you going?” the guy said with a grin on his face. Sara briefly wondered whether or not it’d be okay if she kicked the guy’s grin off his face, along with a tooth or two. And she would’ve, if she was in the mood for a fight. However, the only thing she wanted was to go to her house right now. It’d be some time until it felt like home. Until anywhere felt like home.

Now she understood what people were talking about in the books and movies, about home being a person rather than a place. She _understood_ and it _hurt_.

“It’s only eleven. The night’s still young.” The guy smirked. “And you didn’t see what I was even capable of yet.” She narrowed his eyes to the guy that looked at his forties.

“I’m really not in the mood,” she said with a blank voice, trying to turn around again. The guy stopped her again.

“That skirt says differently.” Stopping, Sara clenched her fist to keep herself from punching the guy. Like he’d be able to stop her. She really was starting to believe he’d drunk that half bottle all by himself. “Come on, give me a chance.”

“I’m not available,” Sara said finally, turning around. She was pretty sure her smile looked like she’d just ate a hoard of sour candies all at once. Technically, it wasn’t true. She wasn’t dating anyone. It’d be ridiculous when she still loved Leonard anyway. But in a way, it was also true. She wasn’t available, because her heart belonged to someone already. The fact that Leonard was dead didn’t change it. It’d never change it. Even if she would be able to move on with someone else, a part of her heart would still belong to Leonard, reserved to him and the future that was stolen from them. “So back off.” Her voice was harsh, and she didn’t feel guilty. Not one bit.

“I don’t see a ring on your finger,” the guy said. “And your boyfriend will never have to know about this.” He stood up, getting all up in her personal space. That was what tipped her over the edge. With one sweep of her hand, she grabbed the guy’s arm, twisted it to his back, and slammed his head to the bar in front of her. The bottle had dropped from his hand, bourbon wetting her shoes. She didn’t care. She couldn’t.

“Hew, what the hell?” the guy said as she leaned forward, pressing on his arm. The guy wailed helplessly.

“I’m saying this one last time, you son of a bitch,” she whispered. “So listen carefully. I’m not some bitch you can mess around with. If I say I’m unavailable, I mean it.” She let him go before pushing him against the bar one last time. “So go find someone else who wants to put up with your stupidity.” It took everything in her to turn back and get out of that bar without hurting the guy. Angry tears had filled her eyes as she clenched her fists. She stared at her motorcycle in front of her, and that was when she finally broke down. All the anger, guilt, fear, and pain she’d been bottling up for the last week had come back to her, and she couldn’t take it. It was just too much.

“I miss you,” she whispered as she found herself sitting on the road, her back to the motorcycle. “I know you’d want me to be strong and move on, but I miss you, Leonard. I… I love you.” It was the first time she’d actually admitted it out loud, and it broke her heart even more. “I wish you were still here with me.” She couldn’t continue as she wrapped her arms around her knees and started sobbing. She felt weak, but she didn’t care.

But she knew, after seeing so much death, that they hadn’t lost each other forever. As long as she loved him, as long as she kept him in her heart, they’d be together in a way. She just wished they could be together in real life, too.


	3. Half Light - Skyeward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Quinn kills Skye with Garrett's orders, Grant realizes his loyalties may be to the wrong person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo obviously this is what happens when instead of going out like any other teenager, I stay at home and write yet another fanfiction. But to be honest, this song had stuck in my head for two days, and once I got the idea for the fanfiction I just couldn't not write it. This is my first Skyeward one shot -though I've read more than a couple of them after what happened on the show- so I hope you like it! Btw, I'm still so angry at the producers of the show for what they did to this couple, and I'll never forgive them, so you will probably see a whole lot of fics about the duo that has nothing to do with the ridiculous path the show took with them. 
> 
> Song: Half Light by BANNERS  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Skyeward (Skye&Grant)
> 
> P.s.: It takes place after 1x13, so if you haven't seen up to that point it contains spoilers. After that, I pretty much changed everything that happened, so you don't need to worry about that except a few minor spoilers here and there. Enjoy!

_What possesses you?_  
_Oh, what possesses you?_  
_Oh, what possesses you?  
_ _Oh, what possesses you?_

_When you're in the half light_  
_Oh, it is not you I see_  
_And you'll live a half life  
_ _You only show half to me_

_Can you shake it off?  
_ _Oh, can you shake it off for me?_

* * *

 

Grant was staring at the door for he didn’t know how long, waiting for Coulson and the team to come back. He so desperately wanted to go with them, to be by Skye’s side, but Coulson insisted he and May should stay at the Bus to protect it. They didn’t know what was inside the caves. Coulson thought it was the drug that saved him when he died. And Grant knew Garrett would want him to insist on joining the team. However, he just watched as Coulson and Fitz-Simmons carried Skye’s body out of the Bus, not interjecting, not insisting, just…watching. Because he was scared. He was scared whatever they’d find in the caves wouldn’t work. He was scared he’d lose Skye. He didn’t care about his mission at all, which was, he knew, wrong, but he just couldn’t. All he could think of was Skye. And guilt tearing him apart inside.

It was his fault. He knew it all too well. Garrett had told Quinn to shoot Skye. Garrett, his S.O. Garrett, his mentor. Garret, who saved his life in many ways, but ruined in others. Garrett, whom he owed everything. _Almost_ everything. Because he didn’t owe him Skye. Never Skye. She was good, inherently good, and she was the best thing that had happened to him his entire life. Only now, as he stood in front of the Bus’s door, he realized how Garrett corrupted him. How he made Grant Ward into a monster, _his_ monster. And the worse part was that he let him, because he was so desperate to be loved and accepted that he didn’t realize that Garrett didn’t really love him, but just using him. Now it was too late. He didn’t know what to do. All he hoped was when Coulson and the team came through that door, Skye was with them and she… She was alive.

The door finally started to open after what felt like hours—though it might as well be just a few minutes—and Grant’s shoulders tensed. But the door only revealed the two scientists, and not Skye. Not even on a bed. His stomach dropped as his heart basically stopped beating. There was no mistaking Jemma’s wet cheeks and the tears in Fitz’s eyes. He also noticed his hand on Jemma’s back, trying to comfort her.

 _No_. That was his first thought. Actually, that was all he could think of as Fitz-Simmons entered the Bus. It wasn’t possible. She couldn’t be gone. She had to be alive. She…

 _No_ …

“Whe-where’s Skye?” he managed to ask as the duo stopped in front of him. Sniffing, Jemma buried her face to Fitz’s shoulder. “Coulson? Where are they?” His voice shook, but he didn’t care.

“I’m-I’m sorry, Ward,” Fitz said, looking up. “The drug… It didn’t work. She couldn’t make it.” Jemma silently sobbed with Fitz’s words, but Grant couldn’t hear them. He couldn’t hear anything. His vision blackened and his ears buzzed as he staggered back. He shook his head.

“No,” he said with a gruff voice. “It’s not possible. She can’t be…” He couldn’t continue as his voice trailed off. Fitz stepped forward, not letting Jemma go, and put his hand on Grant’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Ward. I’m sorry.” Fitz’s voice was thick with emotion too. He looked in the scientist’s eyes. Even though he needed someone to hug him, comfort him, tell him everything was going to be okay, he shook Fitz’s hand off his shoulder.

He didn’t deserve comfort. No. Not at all. Skye was gone, and it was his fault. Maybe not directly, but it was Garrett’s fault. It was HYDRA’s fault. Not that it made a difference. He was HYDRA. He was Garrett’s puppet.

Tears building up in the back of his throat, he spun around, going to the only place in the plane he could be alone. His bunk. Shutting and locking the door, he stopped, looking at his bed with blurry vision. His hands were shaking. Actually, his whole body was shaking.

That was when he broke down. Something inside of him snapped, revealing all the emotions he’d hidden so intricately behind steel walls over the years. All the pain, all the hurt, all his weaknesses, they were all revealed. Basically, everything Garrett made him forget. _No attachments_. That was Garrett’s policy. And it worked for him oh-so well. He didn’t want any attachments. He didn’t want anyone else to hurt him. That was why he agreed to be with Garrett. He thought Garrett could teach him how not to get hurt. Well, he did, but he also made him a cold-blooded murderer, a monster, a traitor and… And Skye’s killer.

Running his hands through his hair, he slipped down the door, burying his face to his hands. A part of him, the part Garrett conditioned to shut off all the feelings, shouted him to get himself together, he had a mission and he needed to please Garrett. Garrett, who killed Skye. He might not have pushed the trigger, but he had aimed the gun. He had killed the woman Grant…loved.

Yes, he had admitted it. He had fallen in love with Skye. This was supposed to be just like other undercover missions, but somehow it got out of hand the moment Skye came into the picture. He had gotten close to her, not because it was his mission but because he wanted to. He wanted Skye. And not just that. He had gotten closer to the team as well, and just like with Skye, he had begun to care about them. This was the first time he felt like he actually belonged to somewhere, even though it was far from truth. He didn’t belong there. Oh, no. If they knew the truth, the team would hate him. They’d throw his ass to a cell, of course if they wouldn’t kill him before. And he’d deserve it. He was just a monster.

Feeling sick, he stared at his hands. There was so much blood in his hands. So many good S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. Innocent people. People whom he didn’t even know. He did it because it was his orders. They were Garrett’s targets. He hated himself. He always hated himself, but he never felt it so fiercely. Wiping his hands off to his pants, he took short breaths. He couldn’t calm down.

Now he had Skye’s blood in his hands, too. And he couldn’t deal with it.

His hands went to his gun, ready to shoot himself. End this. If he continued, he’d only hurt the team more. Like he hadn’t blown a huge hole in it already. Like he hadn’t been shot in the heart already.

His eyes went to his gun, and he gulped. His finger was on the trigger when he stopped. No. If he did this now, his team wouldn’t know about HYDRA. They wouldn’t know HYDRA was planning on taking S.H.I.E.L.D. down. THey wouldn’t know that Garrett was…

They had to know. He couldn’t let Garrett, or HYDRA hurt someone else in his team. He had never been loyal to HYDRA anyway, and he only worked for Garrett because he thought he owed him everything. But no. He didn’t owe anything to Garrett, because Garrett hadn’t fixed his life. He’d ruined it even more.

Standing up, he placed the gun in his pants and opened the door. He was pretty sure he looked horrible. Not that it mattered. He’d be dead in a few minutes anyway.

He bumped into May as he was walking to Coulson’s office. May’s eyes were cold and blank as hell, though they softened when he saw Grant. Oh, if only she knew… That understanding look would probably be replaced by a kick, or a knife, or a bullet. He’d gladly take all of them, honestly.

Clearing his throat, he tried to focus. “Is Coulson back?” he asked. He wasn’t sure how long he stayed in his room. May nodded curtly, and squeezed his shoulder as she passed. That was it. Slowly, he went up to Coulson’s office, and knocked on the door.

“Come in,” Coulson said quietly. He opened the door, heading into the room. Coulson was staring at something on the table, his face emotionless, just like May’s. He looked up at Ward, and worry etched in his expression. “Ward. Fitz-Simmons had told me you needed some alone time.” His voice was soft. Soft. He almost wanted to laugh. Or yell. Or cry. He stared at Coulson for another second, and then tears came back as he threw himself on the chair. Confessions spilled out from his mouth before he could stop them. He told Coulson anything. How Garrett found him. What happened in the forest, where Garrett dumped him. How Garrett, his S.O. was the clairvoyant, and he was working for HYDRA. Most importantly, how HYDRA had infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D., planning on taking down the organization.

And how he was a double agent, working for Garrett all this time. He hadn’t told Garrett anything that important, yet still guilt ate him inside.

“I killed Skye,” he said at the end. “It was my fault, and I… I’m sorry.” He winced with his own words. That was the lamest thing he could’ve said. He didn’t even have the right to be sorry.

Coulson seemed shocked at first. Grant waited him to say something, but he was just staring at him, HYDRA’s agent, without talking. Finally, when silence became unbearable, he stood up and went for his gun. This time, Coulson jumped up to his feet, reaching for his drawer to take his gun. He quickly put his hands up.

“I’m… I’m not going to hurt you. Or anyone…else,” he added. Gulping, he put his gun in front of Coulson. Coulson was looking at the gun like it was a bomb. “Kill me,” he whispered. The pain had become unbearable, and now that Coulson knew everything, there was no reason for him to be alive anymore. “I lied. I hurt you, and the team. I… I’m working for HYDRA. Please.”

“No,” Coulson said finally. Grant blinked with shock. Did Coulson just denied his request? He assumed Coulson would be more than welcome to kill him.

“I’m a traitor. A…monster. I—“ Coulson stopped him with his hand.

“I’m not denying you made a lot of wrong choices. But you’re wrong at one thing. You didn’t kill Skye.” Coulson’s voice was soft, too soft almost. He hadn’t expected that. He started to say Coulson was wrong, but again Coulson interjected. “You could’ve continued with your mission. You could’ve let HYDRA take over S.H.I.E.L.D. You could’ve killed everyone on this plane, but you didn’t. You came forward, confessing to a crime you know would cost you your life, so that we could take HYDRA down? Do you have any idea how valuable the information you gave us is? It could’ve been too late when we finally found out about it, but now we stand a chance against them. Thanks to you.” Grant was speechless. Dumbstruck. He expected Coulson to throw him off the plane, if he was lucky when they were flying. Or shoot him. But he was saying that he was actually helpful?

“I used you. I don’t deserve—“

“We will talk about what you deserve or not later, but right now what you said will stay between you and me. I will inform Fury about it, but only him. He knows the importance of secrets more than me. I’m only asking one thing. I want you to help us take them down, being our double agent this time.” He stopped for a second. “I guess that makes you a triple agent.” Grant stared at Coulson with wide eyes.

“Do you… Do you trust me with that?” he asked. Coulson shrugged.

“You may need to take a polygraph, and I will listen to every electronic conversation you make, but other than that yes. The man standing in front of me right now…” He smiled. “He’s not a killer, nor a traitor or a liar. He’s just lost his way. And he deserves a second chance, trying to find it.” Grant didn’t know what to say as silence stretched, but then he found himself nodding. At least for once, he could do something right. For once, he could be the man he wanted to be. He knew he would never be able to make up for his mistakes, but at least at the end he’d have done right by his team. By Skye.

It didn’t seem like a bad way to die.

* * *

 

Grant hadn’t expected things to turn out this way. Not that they turned out to be bad. With his information, and after Fury agreed Ward to be a triple agent, it turned out at least half of S.H.I.E.L.D. was compromised. However, they finally managed to take HYDRA down, capture Garrett and clean S.H.I.E.L.D. up, with the help of Captain America and Black Widow themselves. The big fight was over.

However, what Grant didn’t know was that Garrett somehow escaped S.H.I.E.L.D.’s custody, and came after him to avenge his betrayal. And now, they were standing in an emptied local café, Grant’s gun somewhere under the tables, his back to the wall, and Garrett pointing a gun at his face. By the look of it, Garrett’s situation hadn’t gotten better since Grant left HYDRA. In fact, he was about to die. He had a few weeks tops.

That fact made him sick once. Now, he just felt indifferent. If he felt anything at all.

“Specialist Grant Ward, agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.,” Garrett said mockingly as he stepped forward. “You know, that was something I thought I’d never say.” Pressing his lips together, Grant didn’t say anything. He couldn’t even face his former S.O. He didn’t care. “I had realized you were becoming distant after I ordered Quinn to shoot that little hacker, but I thought, ‘No, Grant wouldn’t do this to me, I saved his life. He owes me everything.’” Garrett stopped for a second, glaring at Grant. “I guess I was wrong, huh?”

“You killed her,” Grant whispered, finally finding his voice. “You killed Skye.”

“It was necessary for the mission,” Garrett said with a shrug. Anger erupted in Grant’s stomach.

“She was innocent!” he yelled. “She didn’t deserve it. Any of it.” Garrett scowled at the agent.

“And did it hurt you when she died? Because I told you, feelings are weakness. And now, Agent Ward, you know how right I was.” Grant clenched his teeth. He’d been seeing a psychologist for the last few weeks, yet he couldn’t help the bile rising to his throat. He wanted to throw up, and he would if he had eaten something.

“No, it isn’t,” he managed to whisper, remembering the psychologist’s words. He had told Grant that several times. The little teenage boy Garrett saved still believed what Garrett told him, but Grant Ward, the adult knew it was wrong.

“It doesn’t matter anyway. Because now, you’ll know what betrayal feels like. What dying feels like. Slowly bleeding out, helplessly, just like Skye.” Grant clenched his fists as tears filled his eyes. Still, he didn’t attempt to move. He deserved that. He deserved to die. He had caused all of this. “And while you die, know that you were the one that caused Skye that pain. You were the one that—“ Before Garrett could continue, his eyes widened as he staggered forward and he suddenly fell down on the floor. Grant was too shocked to do anything, until he saw the bullet wound behind Garrett’s head. He looked up to see who had shot the man.

And everything suddenly stopped as he looked at the petite, yet strong figure standing by the door. The woman lowered her gun, staring at Garrett’s body with disgust for a few seconds before turning to him. She was squintin.

“I was actually aiming for his chest,” she whispered. The voice struck Grant like a lightning. No. It wasn’t possible. She was dead. Gone. She wasn’t here. Was he dreaming? Or dead? Had Garrett killed him and somehow, he was in heaven?

“Skye?” he whispered, stepping forward. A mischievous grin pulled Skye’s lips, but there were tears in her eyes.

“Hey, robot,” she teased him as she stepped forward. “Sorry about being late. It took me quite some time to activate the tracker Coulson planted on you.” She looked at Garrett and grimaced. “But it looks like I was right on time.” Grant stared at Skye, listening to her snarky comments for one more second before he decided he didn’t care if he was dreaming or dead. Skye was here, in front of him, and that was all that mattered. Before he could stop himself, he closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around Skye, hauling her up to his chest. His knees gave out, and in seconds they found themselves on the floor. He didn’t let Skye go, though. He hugged her fiercely, tightly, stroking her arms, her back, her face, making sure she was there and alive. He buried his face to the crook of her neck. Skye’s arms were around him as well, her hand in his hair, holding him up.

“Shh, I’m here,” Skye whispered. “I’m here, okay? This is real. You’re not dreaming.” Her voice was soft, so soft that it made Grant cry even more.

“Ho-how?” he managed to whisper after a few minutes of them clinging to each other. He pressed his forehead to Skye’s chest. “How are you…here?”

“Coulson,” she whispered. “He’d faked my death, because he was afraid the drug would twist my memories, make me into something I wasn’t. It… It came from an alien.” She took a deep breath, taking Grant’s face in her hands. “I’m sorry I put you through this, Grant.” Shaking his head, he finally had the courage to lift his head.

“I’m sorry.” Taking a shaky breath, he forced the words out. “It was my fault. I— I killed you.” He couldn’t look at Skye’s eyes. He was just about to mutter a string of apologies when she pressed her finger to his lips.

“It wasn’t your fault. And before you say anything, yes, Coulson told me what you did. Grant, S.H.I.E.L.D. took down HYDRA thanks to you. If you hadn’t done what you did, HYDRA would be out there, S.H.I.E.L.D. would be destroyed and most probably all of the agents would be dead. You prevented that.”

“But I lied to you,” Grant argued. He still couldn’t believe Skye would forgive him as well. He expected her to yell at him.

“No, you didn’t. You just didn’t show me your HYDRA agent side. You showed me the real Grant Ward, with his scars, his strengths and weaknesses, his confidence and insecurities, and his goodness. You showed me the man you wanted to be, and now you’re that man. You took off your HYDRA cover and revealed who you really are.” She put her hand on Grant’s chest. “And that’s the man I love.” Air left Grant’s lungs as he looked at Skye. He couldn’t believe her words. She couldn’t love him. He was a monster. He wasn’t good. How could she… “And please don’t tell me you’re not a good man, or else I’ll hurt you, and I’m not lying.” A strangled chuckle left Grant’s lips as he cradled Skye’s face in his trembling hands.

“I love you, too,” he whispered. A light appeared in Skye’s eyes as she smiled with tears, and reaching up to kiss the man she had fallen in love with, and would never give up on. That kiss… It was so powerful that it somehow mended both of their broken souls, making them whole, because for the first time, they both belonged somewhere. And they were exactly at that place. 


	4. Stand By You - Skyeward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Ward finds out about Skye's powers, he tries to be there for her no matter what. 
> 
> Canon Divergence: Ward isn't HYDRA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry I haven't uploaded anything for two weeks, but it's literally the first time I found Internet. I honestly feel like I'm in the middle of nowhere lol. Anyway, I hope you like this one! It may contain spoilers up until 2x12 of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 
> 
> Song: Stand By You by Rachel Platten  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Skyeward (Skye&Grant)

_Hands, put your empty hands in mine_  
And scars, show me all the scars you hide  
And hey, if your wings are broken  
Please take mine so yours can open, too  
'Cause I'm gonna stand by you  
  
Oh, tears make kaleidoscopes in your eyes  
And hurt, I know you're hurting, but so am I  
And, love, if your wings are broken  
Borrow mine 'til yours can open, too  
'Cause I'm gonna stand by you

* * *

 

“Skye,” Ward whispered, looking at his rookie’s face. It was hard to keep his balance when the whole building was shaking like there was an earthquake, but he didn’t even care about that. All he cared about was the look on Skye’s face, like she was in pain. A part of him knew she was the one causing the earthquake. Not because she meant it, or she wanted it, but simply because she was scared. All he wanted was to go to her and hug her, but with the Kree and Lady Sif behind him, he doubted it’d make it better.

“No,” Skye choked out, digging her fingers to her hair. She shook her head. “No, please. I can’t stop.” Ward was about to ignore Sif and Kree and take Skye in his embrace when he heard the former yell.

“We need to contaminate her before she hurts someone!”

“No!” Ward immediately stopped them, turning briefly around to face Sif. “She’s not dangerous.” Sif looked at him like he just said she had two heads.

“She can’t control it. She’s a weapon, created to fight against the race of humans on this world. I need to take her to Asgard. It is the best for all of you.”

“What about what is best for her?” Ward argued. “She’s not going anywhere.” He was glad to see Coulson and May had turned around as well, protecting Skye. He was afraid he’d be alone. He was afraid that others would see Skye as…a danger, too.

“Please make it stop. Please!” Skye yelled as the window behind them shattered. The sound made Ward wince, but it also distracted Sif and Kree enough for May to step forward and attack the duo. She looked at Ward.

“Get her out of here!” she yelled at him. Ward didn’t even have one second to question her orders as Coulson stepped in as well, both of them distracting Sif and Kree to earn them time to get out of here. Quickly, he grabbed Skye from the arm, dragging her out of the room. The building continued to shake, but all Ward cared about was Skye’s trembling lips and ash white face.

“I’ll get you away from them,” he promised her as another window next to them shattered. “I won’t let them hurt you.” Skye barely shook her head, her hair falling over her eyes like a curtain.

“Maybe…. I should go with them,” she said in tears. “I’m…dangerous. I’m a monster.”

“No.” Ward’s answer was immediate. No matter what happened, he’d never, ever believe Skye was anything but good. He wasn’t good. He knew that. He’d made tons of wrong choices. But not Skye. She’d always been good. So good that she managed to reveal the good inside him, too. “You are not a monster. You’re just confused.” He turned right, suddenly deciding to take Skye to the cell with the barrier. “And we’ll figure out a way through this.” Skye shook her head again.

“I—“ Skye’s words were cut by Simmons and Mack running out of the lab. They both stared at Ward and Skye with wide eyes. Understanding flickered in Jemma’s.

“It’s Skye,” she whispered. “She’s—“ She didn’t get the chance to finish her sentence as she lost balance with another quake. Ward tried to get Skye away from them as soon as possible. He’d heard what they thought about Raina. How could he be sure they thought differently about Skye, even though Skye was nothing like Raina?

Finally reaching the cell, Ward half carried Skye downstairs, getting her in the cell. He’d just grabbed the tablet when Skye stopped her.

“Lock me in. Don’t come.” He shot her a glare.

“Not a chance. I’m with you.” He could see the relief and gratitude in her eyes. He put up the barrier, making it sound and vision proof, before turning to Skye. She’d curled up in a ball, her arms around her knees, rocking back and forth.

“I can’t stop it, Grant,” she said desperately. Something cracked in his heart. He didn’t know what caused it, the self hatred and guilt in Skye’s voice or the fact that she’d called her Grant instead of Agent Ward, Robot, or Tin Man. He’d give anything for those nicknames now. “I don’t know how.” Ward cautiously knelt down in front of her, hesitant to hold her hands, let alone hug her. Not that he was afraid of her. No. He was afraid it’d make her close off even more.

“Yes, you can,” he said with full determination. “You can do this, Skye. You’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever met.” He stopped for a second. “And I’m not saying this because the building is about to collapse on us.” A strangled laugh escaped Skye’s lips, but that was it. She covered her face with trembling hands.

“That’s not helping,” she remarked, though she didn’t have to for Ward to realize that. Pressing his lips together, he changed his mind at the last second and grabbed Skye’s wrists in an attempt to pull her hands away from her face. As he imagined, Skye freaked out immediately, but not for the reasons he thought.

“What the hell you think you’re doing? I can hurt you.” Ward blinked, and then he shook his head.

“No, you won’t. See, I’m okay. You won’t hurt me.” He stopped for a second. “You know, there was a time my childhood wasn’t all that bad.” Skye looked at him like he was crazy.

“I’m glad you finally want to talk about your childhood, but it really isn’t a good time, Ward.” He squeezed Skye’s wrists.

“No, just listen. My childhood was probably the crappiest time of my life, but there was this moment that’s kind of fried in my brain that I felt happy. That there wasn’t any fear, anxiety or pain. It was one month after my brother was born, and one night I couldn’t sleep. I was afraid to wake my parents up, so instead I went to my brother’s room. I thought if I watched him sleep, it would calm me down. But he wasn’t sleeping, instead he was crying. I guess my parents were so tired to hear him. At first, I got scared that my parents would wake up and would be angry with me, but he didn’t stop crying and my parents weren’t coming. So I went to his crib, pulled up a chair to see him, and leaned down. The moment he saw me… It was like magic. He stopped crying. Instead, he looked up at me, sucking his thumb. I thought he was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen. I couldn’t help smiling, and I know it’s ridiculous since he was just one month old, but I swear I remember him smiling back at me. At that moment, I forgot my parents, I forgot my elder brother, it was just the two of us and everything was going to be okay. I guess you could say it was the first and only time I felt peaceful in that house.” When he finished, he looked up at Skye. There was a huge lump in his throat and he didn’t even know why. It wasn’t his intention. He was just trying to distract Skye from whatever she was doing, but he got lost in the story. He realized Skye was watching her behind wet lashes. This time, she had held his hands, squeezing them.

“That’s a beautiful memory,” she said with a half smile. Ward smiled back, realizing only then that the building wasn’t shaking anymore.

“I told you that you could do it.” Skye blinked before lifting her eyes and stood up. She looked at her hands, and then her eyes turned back at Ward who had come up to his feet by then. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she suddenly threw herself to him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and burying her head to the crook of his neck.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “Thank you, Grant.” And somehow, those three little words stitched all the broken pieces of Ward’s soul together. It would never be the same, he knew he was too broken for that, but he somehow also knew as long as he had Skye, he’d be okay.

* * *

 

 _Even if we're breaking down, we can find a way to break through_  
Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through Hell with you  
Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you


	5. Wonderland - Captain Swan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Killian has been distant for a few weeks, and Emma is desperate to find what's going on with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this song doesn't really have a happy ending, but honestly as I listened to the song all I could think about was the little moments between Killian and Emma mentioned in the lyrics, and how they lead up to both of them getting together in the end, so even though there's angst in this one it doesn't have a bad ending. Especially after the week I had, I needed it. So here you go, I hope you like it :)
> 
> Song: Wonderland by Taylor Swift  
> TV Show: Once Upon A Time  
> Fandom: Captain Swan (Killian&Emma)

_We found wonderland_  
_You and I got lost in it  
_ _And we pretended it could last forever_

_We found wonderland_  
_You and I got lost in it  
_ _And life was never worse but never better_

* * *

“I think there’s something wrong with Killian,” Emma whispered to her mother as they were standing behind the kitchen counter. Snow lifted her brows.

“What are you talking about?” she asked as she eyed little Neal walking around the room with David behind him. It was almost afternoon, and the family decided to spend the day inside since it has been raining all morning. However, Killian has left before Emma even woke up, and she hadn’t heard from him since then. She probably had called him several times, yet it always went to voicemail. She was starting to get worried. Normally, something like that wouldn’t worry Emma this much. Even if it had been four years, he was still struggling with modern technology. But the thing was, this wasn’t the first time it happened in the last three weeks. Killian was either always busy, or distracted, or tense. She didn’t remember the time they had a relaxed conversation. She was worried something had happened, and she didn’t know about it.

“I… I don’t know how to explain it. He’d been…different. I mean, not like he’d made a hundred-eighty, but he’d been distant and stressed. I’m worried about him.” That made Snow turn to her with her coffee in her hand. “Do you think there’s something he isn’t telling me?” Snow frowned.

“No. I don’t think so. You know Killian loves you, Emma.” She sighed.

“Of course I know that. I’m not worried about him breaking up with me.” The moment she said those words, she hesitated. She’d never thought about that possibility. She always thought it was impossible. In the Underworld, it had been established that they’d had true love. She always thought it’d last, but not all true loves lasted forever. Could that be it?

She shook her head immediately. No, Killian did love her. She knew it in her bones. “I’m worried something happened and he’s not telling me. Did he… Did he say anything to you?” Snow shot Emma a look.

“You know we’re not that close, right?” Emma scowled at Snow.

“Okay, I know, but… David and Killian are close-ish. And David tells you everything.” Snow had nothing to say to that, but she still shook her head.

“I’m sorry, Emma, I have no idea. I wish I knew. But trust me when I say this: Killian loves you, and if he’s hiding something from you, it’s probably for a good reason.” Emma bit down her lip as Neal looked at her with a huge smile on his face. She tried to smile back at him, but she was pretty sure it looked more like a grimace.

She wanted to believe Snow. She truly did. The problem was, she knew Killian better than Snow. In fact, she knew him better than anyone else. And she knew if there wasn’t something really off, Killian wouldn’t be this shut off and distant.

She just couldn’t believe it was for a good reason.

* * *

The rain had finally stopped around sunset, and Emma was perched beside the window, eyeing the road for her pirate’s familiar leather jacket and messy dark hair. Though she had a book in her hand, she had given up on it after reading the same page over and over again without being able to focus and understand something. She desperately wanted to talk with Killian. She was going to ask him what was wrong, and she was going to insist until she got an honest answer. She wanted to help Killian, and how could she do it if he didn’t let her?

Emma was two minutes away from tearing up her book when the front door yanked open, revealing a panicked Snow. Forgetting Killian for a second, Emma stood up. “Mom? Is everything okay?” Snow was breathless.

“It’s… It’s the Granny’s. There’s something going on.” _Oh no_ , Emma thought as her heart stopped. She immediately let her book go. “You need to come now.” Snow didn’t have to repeat herself. They both ran out of the house immediately, without hesitation. For the moment, the Killian situation had taken the back seat for Emma. Instead, she focused on the safety of her friends. The drive to Granny’s from their house wasn’t that long. When she and Snow reached the car, Snow looked at her.

“You go, now. I’ll check on David, okay?” Remembering David and Neal were playing upstairs, Emma quickly nodded before jumping in the car, and started driving. She could almost hear her heart pounding in her chest as her sweaty palms slipped from the steering wheel. Tightening her grip, she prayed everyone was okay. In Storybrooke, you could never be sure. After Cora, Peter Pan, the Wicked Witch, Gold and Cruella, Emma expected anything.

But she didn’t find that when she arrived at the small café. There weren’t swirling magic or flying fireballs or _people_ anywhere. Instead, Granny’s was pretty tidy, if not a little bit overly decorated. Emma had lived in Storybrooke for more than seven or eight years now, yet she’d never seen the café decorated with this much light. There were blue and white twinkling lights everywhere. Emma could also see candles all around the garden too. She also realized as she stepped out of the car that the ground was covered with blue decoration papers as well, making the café look like it was floating on water. Emma’s eyes widened as she made her way slowly towards Granny’s. Her heart was fluttering in her chest. What did all of this mean?

Curiously and with a twinge of fear, she opened the door, and the smell of sea water and wet wood welcomed her. A smile pulled her lips. She felt like she was on Jolly Roger as they were making their way to Neverland. It was the first time she and Killian worked together, the first time Killian selflessly helped her, the first time they kissed. It was maybe the beginning of their story.

And it felt exactly like that, because there was an exceptionally handsome pirate standing in the middle of the room with a single white rose in his hand. There was a grin on Killian’s face. Emma’s mouth dropped open.

“You had a tuxedo?” she couldn’t help asking. She’d maybe never seen him wear one before. Even though he wasn’t wearing that ridiculous pirate costume anymore, which made Emma especially happy, he was more of a leather jacket type of guy. Once a pirate, always a pirate, Emma guessed.

“Well, no,” Killian admitted as he stepped forward. “But for what I’m about to do, tuxedo seemed like the right way to go. David let me borrow his.” Emma lifted her brows. David? So her dad knew about this?

Oh, she was so going to have a conversation with him. After she learned what “this” was.

“What is this?” she asked, looking at the completely transformed café and the dinner on one of the tables, again with a blue candle in the middle of it. The dinner smelled good, too. It was some kind of fish with salad. “I mean, not that I didn’t like it, but… Wait, I didn’t forget about an occasion, right?” Emma looked over at Killian worriedly because that was totally possible. She didn’t remember today being anything special, but she couldn’t be sure.

“No,” Killian said as he stepped forward, taking Emma’s hand in his. “But it’s definitely a special day, love.” Emma lifted her brows.

“That doesn’t really make sense, Killian.” Killian took a deep breath, leading her to table.

“You will. Hopefully,” he muttered under his breath. That only made Emma more curious. He straightened his shoulders up as he sat across Emma, taking her hand in his. “I know I haven’t been myself for the last few weeks,” he admitted. Emma shot him a look.

“Really? I haven’t noticed at all,” she said dryly. Killian narrowed his eyes.

“Hush. Listen first, love.” Pressing her lips together, Emma smiled as she nodded. Killian took a deep breath and gulped. “Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about us and…and where we were going. And to be honest, Swan, we’ve been through almost too much ever since we’ve met. It’s been like sailing in a thunderstorm.”

“Or a rollercoaster,” Emma added quietly. Killian lifted his brows.

“Roller what?” A giggle escaped Emma’s lips.

“I’ll show you sometimes,” she promised, gesturing Killian to continue. Killian took a deep breath.

“When we’ve met, we were enemies. Well, technically all I wanted was to kill Gold, but you were in my way. But somehow, you’ve managed to show me life wasn’t all about revenge. You’ve shown me I could find love again, however impossible it seemed. We went to Neverland together…” They both smiled when they remembered their first kiss together. _A one time thing_ , Emma had said. Yeah, right. “We’ve faced Peter Pan, one of the most dangerous villains of all time. And then right when we came back, we lost each other again. You were out of my reach. That one year was like a nightmare for me. I tried to replace you with, well, a lot of things. It didn’t work. You’d be surprised how many girls Smee picked for me and I had to refuse.” Emma grimaced. They hardly talked about their time away from each other. It wasn’t nice.

“And then I had a way to get to you. I took it immediately. I knew nothing would replace you for me. So I found you, but you already had a life with Henry. You were thinking about leaving me. I… Well, I have to admit, it bloody hurt, Emma.” Emma chuckled, but it was strained with tears filling her eyes and the knot lodged in his throat.

“Killian, where are you going with this?” Killian narrowed his eyes.

“Shush, you’ll make me forget my speech.” Emma shut her mouth, curiosity filling her. Of course Killian’s words were beautiful, but the decorated café, the dinner and the monologue… It was too much for a normal day.

“But then we went back in time. I followed you down there because I couldn’t leave you alone in a situation like this. That dance we had… Even though it was far from being real—we didn’t even had our real names—it was the most beautiful dance for me. And after we fixed the situation with your parents, we came back and you stayed. You chose me. Not me exactly, but you chose your family, and you included me in that family. I could see you were shut off, your walls were up but I didn’t care. I wanted nothing more to break them down. I would wait forever if it meant you’d open up to me. And then Gold took me under his control. He stole my heart. He literally did, but even before that he had me in his hands because I was so scared you’d find out what I did that I did what Gold asked of me. I thought you’d never forgive me. But you did. Even if I didn’t deserve it.”

“You did deserve it,” Emma disagreed. Killian squeezed his hands.

“I know that now. I was trying to be enough for you. So when you became the Dark One, I promised myself I’d never leave you. I know I failed you then, and I’m still trying to make up for what I did, but I know now, after being in the Underworld, that I don’t want to leave you.” A strangled laugh escaped Emma’s lips. “Since, you know, Zeus, the literal king of Olympus brought me back.”

“Well, you deserved it,” Emma said, leaning forward. “If it wasn’t for you, we’d never defeat Hades.” Killian’s smile made Emma’s heart stutter.

“Anyway, enough with the emotional stuff. I want tonight to be a happy night.” He took a deep breath. “I know it’s established we have true love, but back in Enchanted Forest, when two people were in love they made it official.” Emma’s smile literally slipped off her face as she realized what was going on. _Oh my God_ , she thought. Was Killian doing what she thought? “And I heard it’s true to this world as well.” He took a little black velvet box from his jacket pocket, and stood up. Emma couldn’t breathe as she watched him get down on one knee. Her heart doubled its beat.

Killian opened the box slowly, revealing a ring with a light blue diamond on it. Silver strings intertwined on it, giving the feeling of waves crashing. She gasped. It was beautiful, more beautiful than she could ever imagine.

“Emma Swan,” Killian started, taking her hand in his. “Will you marry me and make me the luckiest pirate in the world?” Emma didn’t know what to say for a moment. Not because she didn’t want it, no. Because she was shocked and she didn’t know how anything she could say could match the beauty of this moment.

“Yes,” she managed to say finally with a hoarse voice as she went down on her knees in front of Killian. “Yes, I’ll marry you, Killian.” A smile pulled her lips as tears started to run down her cheeks. Reaching for Killian, she completely forgot the ring as she pressed her lips against his. Killian’s lips devoured hers, his fingers running down her hair, her neck, her shoulder, exploring her body once more with love. She pressed her chest against Killian’s as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. They were both breathless when their lips parted, and Emma hadn’t even realized she’d closed her eyes until she opened them. Her eyes turned to the beautiful ring as Killian took it with shaky fingers.

“It’s so beautiful,” she whispered, one hand still on Killian’s shoulder and the other in his hand. Killian smiled.

“A little magic can do anything,” he joked as he took Emma’s hand, slipping the ring in her finger. It fit her perfectly. She lifted her eyes to look at Killian’s.

“I love you,” she whispered, putting all the emotions she was feeling in those three words. Killian’s eyes were filled with tears as well.

“I love you, too,” he said, holding Emma tightly. And in that moment, they knew whatever they had would be forever, and no villain could take their happy ending away from them.


	6. Bring Me To Life - Olicity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity desperately tries to show Oliver how much reckless he's being after the team separated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! 
> 
> I thought I'd give you another chapter in my free day before I go off again, this time to summer school (apparently school never ends when you get to high school). Actually, I'd written this a while ago but I didn't know if it was good enough, or if I got the characters right. For some reason, I still don't really think I reflected Oliver and Felicity's personalities well, but I hope you liked it!
> 
> Also, I don't really have an idea for a fanfiction now, so if you want something let me know in the comments. Thank you so much for your previous comments, I really appreciate every single one of them. 
> 
> Song: Bring Me To Life by Evanescence  
> TV Show: Arrow  
> Fandom: Olicity (Oliver&Felicity)

_All this time I can't believe I couldn't see_   
_Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me_   
_I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems_   
_Got to open my eyes to everything_   
_Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul_   
_Don't let me die here_   
_There must be something more_   
_Bring me to life_

\---------

The moment Oliver entered the lair, or “Arrow cave” as Felicity liked to call it, she jumped on him without caring about the bow and arrows, or the fact that he was sweaty and bloody from the fight. He had went out again to stop a drug deal that messed with people’s heads, just like Vertigo, when the security turned out to be way more than they’d initially thought. Instead of fighting just three armed guards, Oliver engaged in a fight with eight of them at the same time, no matter how much Felicity begged him to stay away.

“I’m okay, Felicity,” Oliver said, his arms going around her. “It was nothing.” Pulling back, Felicity shot him a glare and punched his shoulder.

“Nothing? Nothing?! You seriously call eight armed guards nothing? Okay, we really need to work on your definition of what is nothing and what is simply not okay.” Putting her hands on Oliver’s shoulders, her eyes traveled on his body. “There’s blood all over you!”

“It’s not mine,” Oliver promised as he held Felicity’s hands, and it’d probably be more believable if it wasn’t for the huge cut right above his brow. Felicity scowled at him.

“Like hell it’s not. Oliver, I told you to stay away. You could’ve been killed! Even your super ninja abilities can’t take down eight armed men. I mean, I don’t know about you, but eight to one aren’t good odds for me.” She challenged Oliver to say something as Oliver sighed and went over to the medicine cabinet. Felicity followed him.

“I couldn’t let the deal continue. A lot of people already got hurt, I wasn’t gonna let that happen again.” Felicity pressed her lips together.

“Okay, yeah, I understand. It was important. But Oliver, it isn’t worth your life,” Felicity argued, putting her hand on his shoulder. Oliver winced, and immediately tried to hide it but Felicity knew Oliver too well for that. She narrowed her eyes. “And you’ve been hurt!”

“It’s nothing,” Oliver argued but the blood dripping from his shoulder said otherwise. Felicity didn’t listen to him.

“Take off your shirt,” she demanded, taking the materials she needed from the cabinet. She had patched Oliver so many times, especially in the last few weeks that she was used to it by now. Oliver stared at her for one more second before taking off his shirt slowly. And yes, the wound was as bad as Felicity imagined.

“You are an idiot,” she mumbled to herself as she got a washcloth, cleaning the wound softly to not hurt Oliver. He winced once, and his muscles were tense under her hands, but he managed to sit straight mostly. Felicity’s fingers traveled down Oliver’s arm and chest, wiping off most of the blood. She could feel Oliver’s muscles tighten under her hands. Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm her beating heart. There was no denying the attraction and electricity between them, even though neither of them ever acted on it. Felicity was grateful, actually. She’d already forgiven Oliver for lying to her, but she still wasn’t sure how to work their relationship out when Oliver spent half his time as the mayor and the other half as the Green Arrow. She took a deep breath as she put the cloth aside.

“It’s a good thing that the bleeding stopped,” she told him. Oliver smiled slightly. “Not so fast, mister. You might still need stitches.” She took the tweezers from the rack.

“It’ll be okay, Felicity. I’m used to it.” Felicity stopped to look up at him after she took out a piece of dirt from the wound.

“You do know that it doesn’t make me feel better, right?” she asked. Oliver smiled at her.

“I’ve come back here with worse wounds than this.”

“And again, it doesn’t make me feel better.” This time, Oliver chuckled, and Felicity couldn’t help smiling herself. It was a small smile, though. “You’re acting recklessly, Oliver. I mean, more recklessly than ever, since I’m pretty sure going out at night to fight criminals is already pretty reckless, but you know what I mean.” She looked up at Oliver’s eyes. They were glued to the floor, his hands gripping on the edge of the table. When he didn’t say anything, Felicity sighed as she took the antibiotic. “I’m just worried about you. I don’t want you to end up dead in an alley.”

“There’re risks in this line of work, Felicity. You know that.” Felicity bit her lip as she slowly applied the antibiotic to Oliver’s wound.

“I know that. But you’re acting like…like the earlier days. When I first joined you. Ever since… Well, I wish there was a better way to say it, and even if there is I can’t think of one right now, but ever since the team separated, you haven’t been the same. You’re out there alone now. Don’t forget that, for _your_ sake. There’s risk, and then there’s…well, there’s going into a battle with eight armed men without back up.” Oliver took a deep breath as he finally turned to Felicity.

“I have you,” he argued. Felicity shot him a look as she took the bandages.

“Yeah, right, because I am so great at fighting or shooting arrows. I won’t be able to help if… If anything happens to you.” Fear was evident in her voice, and she didn’t even care. She couldn’t think of the possibility of losing Oliver. That was why she stayed, she realized. Not just because she wanted to help people—it surely did feel good, though—but also because she’d never forgive herself if Oliver got hurt—or worse—and she wasn’t there to at least try to save him. She couldn’t leave Oliver all alone.

“You’re right,” Oliver said finally. Felicity stopped with the scissors in her hand to cut the bandage.

“I’m sorry, what?” she asked. “Did you just tell me I was right?” Oliver looked at her blandly.

“Yes, because you are, Felicity. I’ve been reckless, but I… I don’t know how to do this alone anymore. I know I’ve been alone for a long time before the team got together, but I depended on them. Sara, Roy, Thea, Diggle… Laurel…” Felicity grimaced with the mention of their fallen friend. She looked over at the Black Canary costume, still on display. They’d never take it down. Just like no one could fill the hole Laurel left behind. “I don’t want anyone in this city to get hurt because I messed up and couldn’t keep the team together.”

“Oliver,” Felicity whispered, putting the bandages away for a second to take Oliver’s face in her hands. “You didn’t mess up. You saved the city… Hell, you saved the whole world from Darkh. You’re a hero, and you can protect this city. I believe in you. I just don’t want you to end up dead because you’re being careless. You deserve to live.” Oliver looked at her with wide eyes for a second, full of vulnerability and desperation. Pressing his lips together, Oliver leaned forward, resting his forehead against Felicity’s shoulder. Felicity pushed his damp hair back.

“Thank you,” Oliver said finally as he pulled back. “For staying with me. For not leaving. I… I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you.”

“You’d still be a hero,” Felicity said confidently. Oliver chuckled.

“I’m not so sure. I’d probably either be dead, lost or consumed by darkness. But you… You keep me in check. Keep me grounded. You remind me I still have a soul, that I’m worthy.” He stopped for a second. “Why didn’t you leave?” The answer was too easy.

“This is my life now. It’s one of the few places I feel like myself. Helping people, saving lives… Besides, I’d told you before, as long as you’re here, I’m not leaving either. I’ll be with you until the end.” Oliver’s eyes filled with tears, which tore Felicity’s heart. To keep her tears from spilling, she turned back to the bandages, covering Oliver’s wound. They didn’t speak as she did her job, though she could feel Oliver’s every breath, every move and every touch. She stepped back as she finished.

“It’s done.” Oliver nodded as he stood up, looking at Felicity.

“Thank you. Again.” Felicity shrugged.

“Well, that’s what I’m here for. Cleaning up your mess or keeping you from making a mess.” She winked at Oliver. “And, you know, helping you with the technology, because honestly, you totally suck at it.” She quickly shut down the computers. “But for tonight, it’s enough. You need to go home and rest, and I’m not taking no for an answer.” She looked at the bandaged wound again. “Maybe you can rest tomorrow as well. You know, just to be sure.”

“Deal,” Oliver said with a smile as he took his clothes. “Good night, Felicity,” he said as he started to leave.

“Wait,” Felicity said suddenly, stopping Oliver. “If it’s okay, maybe I can drop by tomorrow to, you know, check the wound for infections. We don’t want you to get infected, right?” She forced out a laugh. “And then if you’re feeling up to it, maybe we can have dinner? Of course, if it’s okay. If it’s not, then I can just check the wound too, or we can leave it to—“

“Felicity,” Oliver said, stopping Felicity’s babble. “I’d like that. Very much.” There was a flicker of hope and light as he looked at her.

“Good,” Felicity said with a smile, trying to calm her pounding heart. She had no idea where that dinner would go, or why she even asked that, but she was excited. She wanted it. There was no denying that even after everything, she was still in love with Oliver.

“Then I’ll see you tomorrow,” Oliver said. Felicity just nodded, not knowing what to say or just being afraid she’d say too much. She watched Oliver leave before she even started to get ready. She couldn’t help hoping that maybe this time, they’d get it right. Maybe this time, nothing would come between them.

A women could hope.

\--------  
_Wake me up inside_  
 _Wake me up inside_  
 _Call my name and save me from the dark_  
 _Bid my blood to run_  
 _Before I come undone_  
 _Save me from the nothing I've become_  
  
_Now that I know what I'm without_  
 _You can't just leave me_  
 _Breathe into me and make me real_  
 _Bring me to life_


	7. I Know Places - Skyeward AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After S.H.I.E.L.D.’s fall and HYDRA’s take over, Grant betrays HYDRA by choosing Skye, and Skye betrays S.H.I.E.L.D. by helping Grant get away. Now to survive, they’re on the run from both organizations. Will they be able to hide? (Canon Divergence/AUish)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Here's another one shot for you. Actually, I wasn't planning on publishing until tomorrow, but then I decided I made you wait long enough. But I unfortunately didn't have time to edit, so if there're mistakes I apologize beforehand! And obviously, because of the lack of Skyeward in that messed up show that I can't bring myself to watch anymore (I'm around the end of second season) I can't stop writing about them. I hope you like this one! And if there's any specific song or couple you want, just leave a comment. Thank you all so much, I love you!!!
> 
> Song: I Know Places by Taylor Swift  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Skyeward (Skye&Grant)

_Cause they got the cages, they got the boxes_  
_And guns_  
_They are the hunters, we are the foxes  
_ _And we run_

_Baby, I know places we won't be found_  
_And they'll be chasing their tails tryin' to track us down_  
_Cause I, I know places we can hide  
_ _I know places, I know places_

* * *

 

Skye knew a S.H.I.E.L.D. or HYDRA agent when she knew one. She hadn’t been with S.H.I.E.L.D. for long, but she knew their values, their missions, their habits, basically everything she needed to recognize them, even when they were undercover, thanks to Grant. And she knew the blond woman sitting on the bench right across from the hotel they were staying was a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. She was reading a book, pretending not to care about her surroundings, but Skye saw her eyes flicker around the street more than a couple of times. And she was also reading the same page for five minutes.

“They’re here,” she almost snarled as she stepped back from the window immediately and turned to Grant. “They found us.”

She didn’t need to repeat herself as Grant’s jaw locked and his face transformed to the mission mode immediately. They both knew what to do. They had to run away so many times that they’d gotten used to it. Grabbing her tablet, she quickly hacked into the hotel’s security cameras, making them loop. She’d tried that when they first got here, so it didn’t take her more than maybe thirty seconds. Grant, on the other hand, had grabbed their two backpacks, filled with cash, clothes, food and water. It was basically a routine for them right now.

Ever since S.H.I.E.L.D. fell and HYDRA took over, Skye and Grant Ward was on the run. They both betrayed the organizations they worked for, and both S.H.I.E.L.D. and HYDRA was after them. Neither S.H.I.E.L.D. nor HYDRA were forgiving types.

She remembered the day they ran away. Grant had killed the Clairvoyant, his S.O. Garrett and then returned to the base. But unfortunately, it didn’t take long for the others to discover Grant’s involvement with HYDRA. She knew. Grant had told her, right after he came back. She promised to keep it a secret. She loved him, she’d never put him in danger, and besides he’d chosen the right side in the end. He was just lost, and Skye understood that better than anyone. The problem was, she knew the others wouldn’t understand.

So that was why she had barged into his room with her bag on her back, and ordered him to pack up. They left that night, secretly, and they were running away. Still.

“S.H.I.E.L.D. or HYDRA?” Grant asked as he handed her the backpack.

“SHEILD.” Skye said undoubtedly. “She was undercover.” It was true, actually. Whenever they encountered S.H.I.E.L.D., the agents had been undercover. With HYDRA, though… Well, HYDRA loved to create a mess.

“How long has she been there?”

“Not more than an hour. I’ve seen her come around a few times.” Sometimes, Skye questioned if S.H.I.E.L.D. was so desperate that they’ve been sending their average agents. Surely, assuming she wouldn’t be able to stop them, May would’ve given them a harder time than anyone.

Taking one of the backpacks from Grant, she pulled out the lighter from her pocket to hand it to Grant. “You have ten seconds,” he told her. Skye nodded, stopping a second only to put a kiss on Grant’s lips. It wasn’t soft. It was wild, violent and demanding.

“Don’t die,” she almost ordered him as she stepped back, throwing the door open to sneak out. The first time they had to escape from a hotel, they almost got caught because the hotel was literally like a desert. That was when they decided to book more crowded hotels. By burning the blanket in their room, they had the time to escape with the disarray around them. Most likely, the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent wouldn’t even pay attention to them.

At least that was why Skye hoped as she put on her cap. Exactly ten seconds later, the hotel’s fire alarm started ringing. She winced only slightly, but she didn’t let it slow herself. Reaching the fire exit, she quickly ran down. She was gonna meet with Grant at the casino two blocks from where they were staying. Even though she didn’t like to be separated, it was their only choice.

“We need to make a plan,” she remembered Grant said the moment they booked a room at a small hotel and entered there. She’d turned to him.

“Make a plan of what?” A small smile had pulled Grant’s lips, even though it wasn’t a real one.

“An escape plan, Skye. In case S.H.I.E.L.D. or HYDRA finds us.” Skye had lifted her brows, which made Grant look at her exasperatedly. “Sometimes I forget you were with S.H.I.E.L.D. only a year.” She’d shot him a glare.

“You do remember that I saved your life, right? I mean, even if it’s not your life, I save you from imprisonment for life.” She’d smirked as she sat on the bed and crossed her legs. Grant had sat next to her.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” he’d told her maybe the hundredth time. Skye had scowled.

“Yeah, I had to. Look, Grant, I don’t regret my decision. I couldn’t just let them lock you up forever. You… You killed Garrett for me, and I knew how hard it was for you. I owed you that.”

“You don’t owe me anything, Skye,” Grant had disagreed. “I betrayed you in every way possible. If someone owes something, it’s me.” Skye had sighed. She’d known it’d take some time for Grant to believe he wasn’t the murderer, the monster he thought he was. She also knew she’d never stop reminding him, and believing in him.

“You’d expect a superspy to be a little bit more confident,” she’d muttered under her breath. Grant had lifted his brows.

“I am confident.” Skye had pressed her lips together. She had to admit, in some ways Grant almost seemed even a bit overconfident. Shooting a bullet, being a double agent, infiltrating a huge organization of spies, and fighting with any weapon she could think of, including Grant’s fists. In himself, though? Saying “not so much” would be an understatement.

“Not in the ways that matter. You don’t love yourself,” Skye had said softly, grabbing Grant’s hand. However, he’d pulled it back with a scoff.

“There’s nothing to love.”

“I disagree.” Skye’s answer had been quick, without any hesitation. “And I will show you that.”

Skye was proud that she’d at least succeeded in some ways. Grant had been more at ease than he’d ever been, even before Skye found out he was HYDRA. He smiled more, had less nightmares, and he didn’t worry as much as he used to. If it wasn’t all an act, which Skye doubted, he had changed. He had escaped from HYDRA and Garrett’s control, or even brainwashing or abuse as some might call.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she only noticed the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent waiting in front of the emergency exit at the last second. She came to a stop, muttering a string of curses under her breath. So this S.H.I.E.L.D. agent was at least smart enough to know the fire wasn’t just a coincidence. She took a deep breath as she stepped back, and in a rash decision pulled her head down and ran out of the doors. She forced tears to fill her eyes.

“My husband!” she shrieked suddenly. The road was crowded enough that a few people turned to her with confused looks. She tightened her grip on the strap of the backpack as she looked around frantically, filling her face with as much fear and pain as she can. “Please, help me. My husband!” She glanced at the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent only briefly to see her reaction before literally clinging onto the man a few feet away from her. “He’s… He’s stuck in there,” she said breathlessly. “There’s a fire. Please, you need to help him!” The man was so shocked that it took him a few seconds to recover.

“I… I’m sorry, madam,” he said as he stepped back. Skye pressed her lips together as she looked around helplessly.

“Please. I can’t lose him. He’s everything I have.” Putting her hands on her stomach, she looked down lovingly. “He’s everything _we_ have.” She knew people always helped pregnant women more, especially if they were in danger. A hand wrapped around her waist as the man she’d clung to earlier pulled her to a bench.

“Somebody get some water,” he said to a women with platinum blond hair. There was a small crowd around her, including the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. When she looked up at the agent, she realized her lips were curled in a sneer. She gave her a hateful look for less than a second before continuing her act.

“I… I don’t know what happened.” She looked at her shaking hands. “One moment we were together, and then there was fire, and… And he pushed me to the emergency exit but he was… He was gone. I have to find him. I… I can’t live without him. I have no one.” Someone put her hand on her shoulder. It was the woman with the platinum blond hair. Skye now realized she was younger than she first thought, around her twenties, as she smiled at Skye.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find your husband,” she reassured her. “What’s your name?” The name tumbled down her lips with a sniff.

“Melanie. Melanie Fischer.” She took the napkin someone handed to her. “Th-thank you.” Her hand was still on her stomach as she eyed the road. Grant was supposed to pass by in a few minutes to reach where they were meeting. “My husband, he’s… He’s amazing. And he was only here because we… I wanted it. It’s my fault.” She felt someone stroke her knee as she wiped her fake tears, eyed the road again. At that exact second, like they both felt each other, Grant bolted into the street. Skye took in a sharp breath as she stood up shakily.

“Dixon?” she whispered, but she knew Grant had heard. He slowly came to a stop as his eyes found Skye. Relief washed over her seeing that he wasn’t hurt, at least visibly. Even though it had been a slight act, it was easier to burst into tears when you actually was so relieved. She covered her mouth with her hand as she ran to Grant. “Oh my God, you’re okay!” she screamed almost, and threw herself in his arms. “I thought I lost you.” Burying her face to Grant’s shoulder, she quickly whispered her plan. “S.H.I.E.L.D. agent at seven. Husband and wife. I’m pregnant. Play along.” She didn’t need a confirmation to know Grant would act it out immediately. His arms around her tightened as he stroked his hair. His hands were shaking, and Skye was pretty sure there were tears in his eyes.

“Shh, I’m here baby. I’m here. I’m okay.” Skye felt his hands trailing down her hair to her shoulders as he pulled back slightly, putting one hand on her stomach. He looked so worried suddenly that even Skye almost believed they’d been married and she was pregnant.

But it’d be impossible, given the situation they were in.

“Is the baby…?” Skye put her hand on Grant’s instinctively. She saw a flicker of surprise in his eyes before he covered it up. She shook her head.

“She’s okay. She’s perfect.” Grant shot her a look.

“How do you know it’s a she? Maybe it’s a he?” Skye smiled at Grant. She knew it was dangerous, but whenever they were together she sometimes forgot it was all an act.

“I feel it,” she whispered as she hugged Grant again. And then the whole bubble of their fake marriage had disappeared. Grant hid her mouth with Skye’s hair.

“We need to get out of here,” he whispered to her quietly. Skye nodded as she stepped back and wrapped her arm around Grant’s. She turned back to the small crowd behind her, eyeing the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent one more time. There was a smile on her face, but Skye was pretty sure it was a fake one. She cleared her throat.

“Looks like I worried for nothing,” she said with a laugh. “Pregnancy hormones, I guess.” She challenged the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent to say something with her gaze. Luckily, the agent stayed quiet.

“We better go, honey. I don’t want you around the police or anything.” Anxiety had been audible in his voice as he stared at her stomach. Skye nodded as they turned around, hand in hand after Skye waved to the crowd. They’d just turned the corner to the crowded street when Grant leaned down to Skye’s ear.

“She’s behind us.” Skye clenched her teeth. She knew the agent wouldn’t give up that quickly, but she was at least hoping they could put some distance between them and her before she followed them.

“Dammit,” she whispered to herself, peeking up at Grant to fake a smile. “What are we gonna do?”

“Follow my lead,” Grant said in full mission mode. Skye nodded without a doubt. She knew Grant could get them out of here. She trusted him. With everything she had.

Grant held her hand tightly as he eyed the mess around them with the firefighters and police, and suddenly turned around as he pulled her inside the casino. She could hear behind her that they should get out of the hotel immediately. She didn’t care. Her eyes were glued to Grant’s back. She glanced behind her to see if there was anyone following, and her eyes found the agent right behind them. She cursed.

“Grant, she’s following,” she said as quietly as possible, but she knew he heard from his grip tightening around her hand. They were running around the lottery machines that reminded Skye a maze. Skye understood now. Even if the place was deserted, with the lottery machines and flickering lights it was hard for anyone following them to keep up with them. She also knew there was a back exit from the casino, right around the restrooms.

Yeah, they checked the hotels they were staying in thoroughly. Exits, floor plans, potential hiding spots, surveillance system and the places the cameras missed, basically everything that’d help them get out of the hotel as swiftly and quickly as possible if need be. Like right now.

Grant turned to the hallway heading to the restrooms, and passed by them to reach the exit. He kicked the door open, letting Skye passed first. This time, Skye grabbed his hand, not wanting to be separated from him. Grant had nearly suicidal protective instincts when it came to her: The last time they encountered HYDRA, he stayed back to fight five armed HYDRA agents. He was all bloody with broken bones when he came to their meeting point.

“Damn,” Grant muttered as he looked around the small alley. There was no one around them. If the agent managed to follow them…

Yeah, it wouldn’t be nice.

They started running immediately, Skye’s heart beating in her chest, but they weren’t fast enough. Before they were even close to the road, a voice stopped them.

“Don’t take a step forward, or I’ll shoot.” Skye stopped abruptly, looking at Grant next to her. The agent didn’t seem like she was joking, but Skye couldn’t exactly be sure. Grant, though, shook his head sideways slightly before squeezing Skye’s hand. They turned around slowly, with one of their hand in the air and the others clutched together.

For the first time, Skye took a good look at the agent. She wasn’t actually as blond as Skye thought, it was like a darker tone, like honey blond. Her face had hard lines that made Skye think she didn’t laugh much. She was muscular, though, under her undercover tank top and jeans, and her posture wasn’t wavering as she pointed the gun at them. Skye realized that Grant was right. The agent wasn’t joking.

“Wow, congratulations. You’re the first S.H.I.E.L.D. agent that managed to catch us, you know that?” Skye retorted at the agent’s expression. The agent scoffed.

“You weren’t exactly being subtle. The sudden and convenient fire, husband and pregnant wife act… It was all obvious for me.” She smirked in a way that made Skye shiver. She leaned more into Grant, bringing her backpack close to their clutched hands, so that Grant could reach the gun in the side pocket. It was an ICER. Even though they were running away, after S.H.I.E.L.D.’s fall they didn’t really want to kill S.H.I.E.L.D. agents.

“It worked before,” Skye shrugged, trying to distract her. “But not on you. How did you know?”

“Besides the fact that the fire was in the hotel you were staying in? I know what you look like, agent Skye.” Her face softened a bit. “You don’t have to do this, you know? You can still do the right thing. Turn him in, and you’ll get your badge back.” Skye actually felt Grant stiff beside her, even though it wasn’t visible on his face. She glanced at him briefly. She didn’t even have to think about her decision.

“Not a chance,” she snarled.

“You’ll throw your life away for him? Be a criminal?”

“Yes, if that’s what I have to do to be with him. You don’t know him like I do.” She stopped for a second before adding, “and I love him.” The agent’s lips tightened as she tightened her grip on the gun. Skye felt Grant step forward slightly. Her heart stuttered.

“No,” she mouthed to him, but the agent hadn’t missed Grant’s move. Her gun turned to him suddenly and she shot the gun once. Skye acted on instinct. Before Grant could push her out of the way, being her protective bodyguard, she threw herself in front of him and covered her chest with the backpack. The bullet hit the backpack, but it still made Skye stumble back, and she let herself fall to make the agent think she was shot. It would give Grant the best access to the backpack, and therefore the gun.

“Skye!” Grant yelled suddenly, and she felt his arms around her, softening her fall. He cradled her up his chest. “Skye, no…” He sounded so desperate that she thought for a moment to drop the act, but she was sure of one thing: The S.H.I.E.L.D. agent didn’t want to hurt her, which meant it’d at least throw her off her game for a couple of seconds. And the second thing? She knew Grant would use that advantage.

And she was proved right when there was a shuffle around the backpack and another shot was fired, the familiar sound of the ICER. Fingers were still in her hair, holding her head up, but she knew Grant’s shot was dead on. He never missed. Even in a situation like this.

Still, it hurt her when she felt his hands shaking. It cracked her heart, seeing Grant showing a weakness like that. Normally, he kept his posture no matter what he was feeling.

“Come back to me, please,” he pleaded as Skye’s eyes fluttered open. She found herself staring at Grant’s brown eyes, filled with anxiety.

“Is she… Um, you know, knocked out?” she asked in a whisper. Grant nodded, his hand spreading on her stomach.

“Where did the bullet hit you?” he asked, trying to look for the wound. She shook her head as she straightened up.

“It didn’t hit me. It hit the bag.” She took a deep breath. “I just thought if she thought she killed me, she’d be distracted. I was right.” She shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, but Grant was looking at her like she just grew a second head. “What? I was thinking strategically, like you taught me.”

“Skye…” he mumbled as he pulled her into a tight hug. She felt herself crushed in his embrace, but she didn’t care. She wrapped her arms around him as she closed her eyes, leaning her head on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry. I thought it was a good idea.” Grant sighed as he pulled back, but his hand was still tangled up in her hair behind the nape of her neck.

“It was. But don’t ever do that again. I…” He took a deep breath. “I can’t lose you too.” Skye felt her chest tighten with his words. With a smile, she reached up to push back his damp hair.

“Don’t worry, Robot. I’m not going anywhere.” And she’d try damn hard to hold that promise.

* * *

_They take their shots, but we're bulletproof_


	8. Flares - Skyeward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sequel to I Know Places - Skyeward AU
> 
> When Skye gets shot, Grant is forced to take her to hospital to save her, but they end up getting caught by S.H.I.E.L.D. (Canon Divergence - AUish)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has it ever happened to you when you suddenly get an idea in the middle of the day about a perfect fanfiction story, and you decide to write it later because you have a thousand things to do, like studying or finishing that Supergirl fanfiction you started, or continue your novel, but then you get so bored that you decide to write that fanfiction anyway and then write down three thousand words? Because that was exactly what happened to me. Obviously I'm a mess when it comes to Skyeward, because I just can't stop writing about them. It might be that every other couple I ship is either in a good place or the writers hasn't messed them up yet. Anyway, I hope you like it, and tell me what you think! 
> 
> Also, if you have a specific request, you can always add a comment to tell me :)
> 
> Song: Flares by The Script  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Skyeward (Skye&Grant)

_Did you break but never mend?_   
_Did it hurt so much you thought it was the end?_   
_Lose your heart but don't know when_   
_And no one cares, there's no one there_

_Well did you see the flares in the sky?_   
_Were you blinded by the light?_   
_Did you feel the smoke in your eyes?_   
_Did you? Did you?_   
_Did you see the sparks feel the hope? You are not alone_   
_Cause someone's out there, sending out flares_

* * *

Skye woke up with a blinding light illuminating her eyes behind her eyelids. Her first instinct was to open her eyes, to see the source of the light, but she stopped, remembering what Ward had taught her. _Always analyze your surroundings when you wake up in a place you don’t know before you open your eyes. If you’re captured or kidnapped, you might learn valuable information that you couldn’t have if the enemy knows you’re awake._ So Skye stopped, evening her breath, and listened for anything suspicious around her. There was a beeping sound, and she could feel a sting on her lower arm and there was a throbbing on her head. The blanket under her was—

“Hello, Skye.” Her heartbeat spiked with the familiar voice. Not exactly the one she was accustomed to wake up to in the last few months. The one she dreaded to her in those months, even though it was the voice of the person that was a father figure to her once.

Deciding there was no point in acting like she wasn’t awake anymore because of her body’s immediate reaction, she opened her eyes. Her observations was right, she was in some sort of a hospital type of room. It took her a few seconds to realize she was in the Providence.

“Coulson,” she said with a blank, emotionless voice, hiding the frantic and freaked out voice in her head, asking questions she couldn’t answer. The questions she didn’t want to know the answers to. Like where was Grant? Was he in the Providence, or did they throw him somewhere else? Did they kill him? The question filled Skye with dread, so she immediately dismissed it. Instead, she focused on how they ended up here? Were they captured? Skye couldn’t really remember.

“Won’t you ask me where Ward is?” Coulson said. His tone wasn’t hostile, but it wasn’t soft or understanding either. It wasn’t the tone she was used to.

“I assumed you’d throw him in a cell,” she said indifferently. She never thought she’d actually hope that to be true. But she’d never let Coulson know that. Not when she knew his opinions about Grant.

“He is where he belongs. Where every HYDRA agent belongs.” This time, Coulson did sound hostile. Skye clenched her teeth and she tried to sit up, but the stinging pain in her shoulder stopped her halfway as she winced. She looked at there. She hadn’t noticed it before, but there was a huge bandage, and—

 _Oh, my God_ , she thought as she suddenly remembered what had happened. HYDRA. It was them. They’d caught Grant and her off guard, and there was nothing they could do other than try to run. But there were bullets fired, and one of them hit her shoulder. The other… The other hit her stomach. She winced again at the memory, not just it but the other memory that resurfaced. Ian Quinn, standing in front of her, shooting her in her stomach _twice_ …

She wanted to throw up.

She could barely remember Grant’s reaction. He was frantic. Freaked out almost. He wanted to call 911, go to hospital but Skye had stopped him. She didn’t want to put them in danger, and if they went to a hospital she knew Coulson would figure it out quickly and send agents to take them. So she’d begged Grant not to do it before she lost her consciousness. She didn’t remember the rest, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out Grant hadn’t listened to her. She muttered a string of curses under her breath.

“Grant doesn’t belong behind bars,” she grunted. It probably would’ve been a little bit more effective if she wasn’t trying to hide her pain and worry. “He saved my life. Several times, Coulson. He risked his life for me. Does that sound like a HYDRA agent to you?” Coulson didn’t say anything, just stared at the wall, so Skye continued. “I was shot, right? And when you caught us, we were in a hospital.” Again, Coulson stayed quiet. “I begged Grant to run away. To leave me. I knew if we went to hospital, we’d get caught. But he still did it. To save me.”

“He was HYDRA!” Coulson yelled finally. “How can you ignore that? How could you ignore that when you took him off the base? Agent Hand says he killed Garrett. Fine, let’s say I believe that. How could you know it wasn’t a part of a bigger plan? You learnt he was HYDRA, and you just decided because he killed Garrett for you, he wasn’t a murderer? A traitor?”

“Because I knew!” Skye shouted back.

“Yeah, you learnt after you took him out. How di—“

“No, I knew it before,” she shot back again. Coulson blinked. Shutting her eyes, she clenched her hands on the blanket. “I knew Grant was…used to be a HYDRA agent before because he told me.” She chose her words and spoke carefully and slowly.

“He told you?”

“Yes. He told me. Right after he came back, after he killed Garrett. He confessed everything.” Coulson was speechless, and for once dumbfounded.

“How did you know he was telling the truth?” Skye wanted to roll her eyes.

“I knew because what he said wasn’t pretty.” Well, that was an understatement. “Those were things you wouldn’t say to the woman you love. He said those to me knowing there was a chance I would hate him. Hell, he probably thought I would hate him. But he still said them. That was how I knew it was real.” She took a deep breath and continued. “Yes, he did a lot of bad things for HYDRA, but he was a good guy. I knew that. He’d just lost his way. When you grow up the way we did… You do everything to find a home. To find someone to care about you. Garrett used that against him and manipulated him. It was understandable.” She waited Coulson to say something.

“Why didn’t he tell us then?”

“I told him not to,” Skye confessed quietly. “I heard the way you were talking about Garrett. You acted like he had never been your friend. He was a HYDRA agent, and that was it for you. Not just you, but also May as well. I couldn’t let you lock him up.” She stopped, thinking about her words. “He wanted to turn himself in. To stop running. He didn’t want to put me in danger.” Her hands curled around the blanket. “He’s a good guy. And he loves this team. You have to understand. He killed Garrett for us. And what Garrett did to him… Keeping him in the forest all alone for years… Punishing him whenever he did a wrong thing… Manipulating him into being the killing machine he wanted Grant to be… It’s almost like brainwashing. Garrett made Grant think he owed him everything. He used Grant. And he came back from that, for us. For…me.” Skye smiled when he remembered Grant thanking her for that.

“Skye, he was a—“

“See, that was why I didn’t want to tell you!” Skye yelled suddenly as rage filled her chest. “Because you judge him by the organization, the person he worked for. You don’t realize that he changed. Yes, he might’ve lied to us, and he might’ve been a traitor, but he isn’t anymore.” She bit her lip. “You gave me a second chance when I betrayed the team. Why can’t you do that for Grant? Because all I’m asking for is that. If you believe in second chances this much—and I know you do—just give him one. Give him the chance to change, the chance to do better.” She sighed. “To be better. You know, he hadn’t killed anyone since we left.” Waiting for Coulson’s answer was agonizing. That was then she realized she didn’t have cuffs on. That showed some level of trust Coulson had for her. All she prayed was that he would trust her with Grant, too.

“Okay. I’ll try,” Coulson said finally. Skye lifted her head to look at the person she considered a father once. “I’ll give him a chance. But if he does anything—“

“He won’t,” Skye said confidently and a bit excitedly. “I promise you, he won’t.” She couldn’t stop smiling. “Thank you.” She quickly wrapped her arms around the director. Coulson was surprised at first, but then he hugged her back.

“It’s good to have you back, Skye,” he whispered. Skye was hoping he couldn’t feel her tears.

“It’s good to be back.” Pulling back, she wiped her tears away. “Now if it’s okay, can I get Grant out of his cell?”

\-------

Grant was desperate. He had no idea how long he was waiting in the cell, behind the opaque barrier, but it felt like days for him. And he hadn’t heard from Skye ever since Coulson grabbed him and Skye from the hospital and brought them in. Of course, he knew what he was doing when he went to that hospital. He knew the team would find them. But he couldn’t lose Skye. He couldn’t just let her die. He’d betrayed her, let her down so many times. He couldn’t do it again.

But waiting was like a torture. Not knowing killed him. What if Skye didn’t make it? What if she was dying—or already dead—and he wasn’t there for her? He’d pleaded to whoever was behind the barrier, or watching him from the camera in the room, to let him see Skye, or at least tell him how she was, but no one answered. No one listened.

He hated himself. This was his fault. If he was able to protect Skye, she wouldn’t be shot. She wouldn’t be on the brink of death again. He couldn’t lose her. Not now. Not when his life started to seem like a good one for the first time.

Finally, after what felt like forever, the barrier was gone. He stood up immediately, getting ready to demand to see Skye one more time, but the person standing behind the now gone barrier wasn’t the one he expected. He stopped short, his breath getting caught in his throat.

It was Skye. She’d woken up.

Grant had to admit, she didn’t look that good. Her face was still pale, her hair was tangled. There was a huge bandage around her shoulder and her stomach, and she had to lean to a crutch to stand up. But it was her. And no matter how she looked, with that grin on her face she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“Skye,” he gasped as he stepped forward. He was afraid it was just a dream or an illusion. But Skye didn’t disappear. Her grin just widened as she stepped forward slightly.

“Hey.” Her voice was soft, almost dreamy. “I’m back.” And that was all he needed to hear to know Skye was alive. She was very much alive, and she was very much with him. He didn’t stop as he lurched forward. Luckily, the barrier didn’t just turn transparent. It really was gone. And in a few seconds, her arms were around Skye. Even though a part of him wanted to buy her in his chest tightly, he stopped short. He didn’t want to hurt her.

“I was so worried,” he whispered to her ear as one of her arms went around his waist. “I thought you—“

“Hey,” Skye said again, pulling back to look at Grant’s face. She cupped his cheek. “I’m here, okay? I’m alive. You didn’t lose me.” She reached up to plant a kiss to his lips. It was a small and short one, but it was still scorching. After days of being without her, he missed her badly. So badly that it almost hurt, until she was in his arms again. Tears filled his eyes as he rested his forehead against Skye’s. He shut his eyes tightly.

“I can’t lose you. I… I can’t come back from that.” Skye’s hands went around his neck.

“You won’t. I promise you. I’ll stay by you as long as I can.” He opened his eyes to pull back, and suddenly the reality of the situation hit him. They were in a SHIELD secret base. And he was pretty sure they wouldn’t make it out again, with Skye in the condition she was in, and with security probably being tighter than before. He was in a prison. The only reason Skye would be here would be that Coulson had forgiven her. And he suspected the courtesy extended to him.

He was a HYDRA agent, and the protégé of the man that betrayed Coulson in the worst way. He couldn’t be with Skye, if he wanted her to be accepted. If she wanted to be a SHIELD agent again, and he knew she did, he had to let him go.

The realization hit him hard in the gut. He almost felt breathless. The last thing he wanted was to let Skye go. She was the one who made him believe he could be a good person. That he could be forgiven. Without that support, he couldn’t survive. He’d fall back into darkness again, with self loathing, guilt, and pain. It’d kill him.

But if it meant Skye could live the life she wanted, he’d bear it. It’d be okay. Knowing she was happy would be enough.

“Grant, are you okay?” Skye asked anxiously when he didn’t say anything for a while. “You look pale.” That is the understatement of the year, Grant thought as he pressed his lips together. One of his hands went to Skye’s good shoulder, holding her tightly as he pressed his lips to Skye’s softly. The kiss wasn’t demanding or passionate. He just wanted to taste her lips one more time before the others threw him back into his cell, and he wouldn’t see her again.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered when their lips parted. Skye looked surprised.

“For what?” she asked. Grant couldn’t find the right words to day before Skye continued. “And if you say for not listening to me and bringing me to hospital, even though I’m still a bit mad about that, I should actually be thanking you.” Grabbing his chin, Skye forced him to look at her. “You saved my life, knowing we’d get caught. Knowing they might throw you in a cell.” She looked at the little prison with a grimace.

“No, I’m sorry for making you run away with me. I’m sorry for not being able to protect you. And I… I’m sorry for not being the SHIELD agent that you deserved. For working for HYDRA, and for being the one to ruin what we had.” This time, Skye was really surprised.

“Ruin what we had? Grant, what are you talking about?” she asked. Grant pressed his lips together.

“Coulson forgave you,” he stated. It wasn’t even a question. Coulson loved Skye, and she didn’t really do anything wrong. Other than standing by the wrong person. Once they broke up, it’d be okay. Skye would be back on the team.

Skye’s eyes started to shine immediately. “I wanted to talk to you about that, actually. Coulson did forgive me, but Grant, he also—“

“Good,” Grant interrupted without letting her continue. “Then you need to get back on the team. You belong there. I don’t.” Understanding flickered in Skye’s eyes.

“Grant…”

“And we can’t be together.” Grant rushed the words out before tears clogged his throat. “You can’t be with me and be a SHIELD agent. I’m a traitor and I’ll spend the rest of my life in a prison. I deserve that too. But you don’t. If you are with me, they will never trust you truly. They will view you as a traitor as well. I don’t want that. That’s why I’m sorry. I could be with you, but I ruined my chance.” Grant expected Skye to look painful, or at least grimace, or a hopeful side of him hoped she’d disagree, but she laughed. He blinked bewilderedly. “I’m not joking.”

“No, I know,” Skye said as she stopped laughing, and looked at him…compassionately? How was that possible? “That was what I was trying to tell you. Coulson decided to give you a second chance.” Grant couldn’t respond at first. He’d played the conversation at least ten times in his mind, and he didn’t even consider the possibility of Skye saying Coulson forgave him, let alone her proposing that idea.

“What?” he asked again. Skye’s smile was radiant.

“He gave you a chance, Grant. You won’t have that much independence or access to some missions, and you’ll have to stay here and be monitored for at least a couple of weeks, but you’ll get all of them back in time. If you behave,” she added in the end. Grant would’ve tensed, thinking Skye didn’t trust him if he didn’t know she was joking. She trusted him, fully.

He wouldn’t break her trust. Not just that, he’d never betray the team again.

“How?” he managed to ask finally. “How did you make Coulson believe I’ve changed?” Shrugging, she put her hand on Grant’s heart.

“It’s easy to make someone believe something when you believe in it wholeheartedly. And I believe in you, Grant.” She looked up at him. “I believe you can be good, because I know you. And I love you.” His heart skipped with Skye’s words as he felt like it would explode from emotions. No matter how much he heard Skye said she believed in him, or loved him, he still felt her heart swell, and he felt grateful to whatever was up there—even though he didn’t really believe in those kinds of stuff.

“I love you too,” he answered, hoping his face and his tone told everything he wanted her to know. “And I won’t betray you.” He wasn’t very good at keeping promises, but he knew he’d keep this one.


	9. Speak Now - Kara&Winn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara is stressed about Winn having a date, but how will things progress when his date is interrupted with a metahuman?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!! I'm sorry this took so much time, but I couldn't find any inspiration for days. I'm so glad I finally finished it though, and I hope you like it! I haven't had a chance to edit it, so if there're any errors I apologize for them. The fic doesn't really fit the song, at least the story of the song, but I did an interpretation of it and used the idea and feeling of the song. I really love Taylor Swift -if you haven't realized that by now- and her songs, and I just wanted to use this for a cute but a bit angsty Kara&Winn fanfiction. Tell me what you think about it, and if you have any couple/song requests just leave it in the comments. Thanks, and I love you all!
> 
> Song: Speak Now by Taylor Swift  
> TV Show: Supergirl  
> Fandom: Kara&Winn

_I hear the preacher say, "Speak now or forever hold your peace."_  
_There’s the silence, there’s my last chance._  
_I stand up with shaky hands, all eyes on me._  
_Horrified looks from everyone in the room_  
_But I’m only looking at you._

* * *

Kara didn’t know how long she’d been flying. She was pretty sure it’d been at least half an hour, though. If the situation had happened two years ago, before she decided to become Supergirl, she probably would’ve been home, watching some crappy reality TV or a drama/romance movie with two bowls of ice cream in her hands. But now, flying helped her clear her mind better than what fake family drama Kardashians were going through that night. The rush of the wind in her hair, the city lights under her and starts above her, especially in a cloudless night like this one; it made her feel nothing could bother her, that she was free.

And since Winn was going on a date with his new neighbor that night, she kind of needed that stress-freeness.

Thinking about Winn and his potential new girlfriend erased the smile from her face as she remembered him telling her. He’d been so excited about the “new blond psychologist” that moved in across his apartment. Apparently, she’d just graduated a couple of years ago, she was young and she was really nice. Oh, and her eyes were so dark that they almost looked like black, and it completed her full lips and big eyes so well.

Winn’s words, not hers.

Trying to forget the girl and Winn together, she shot forward, increasing her speed enough that the lights of the city blurred.

“Supergirl, we have a situation,” Alex said through the coms she was wearing right at that second. She literally jumped on and hugged the distraction. Slowing down and stopping, she squinted to look at the city.

“What’s going on?”

“A possible metahuman attack at the corner of Figueroa & 5th Streets, just around the Steak, City & Love restaurant.” Kara froze when she heard the overly familiar name. Winn had spent days trying to pick the perfect restaurant for the date. Apparently, the girl loved steak, and Steak, City & Love was one of the best steak restaurants in the city. It was also close to where Winn—and consequently the girl—lived, so it was like win-win for them. Not so win-win for Kara.

And now there was an attack at the restaurant.

“I’m on my way,” she said through her shortened breaths and pounding heart. Even her palms were sweating, which didn’t happen a lot. She shot forward again, going as fast as she could, probably faster than she ever did. But she couldn’t let Winn get hurt. She couldn’t let him die, not before—

Not before he knew that she… She had feelings for him, too. Maybe it was too late. Maybe Winn had gotten over her. It didn’t matter. She wanted him to know.

She was at the restaurant in a matter of seconds, only to see someone throwing a ball of fire to the door. Her heart jumped in her chest as she landed in front of the man, the man who had flames erupting from his hands. He had a vicious smile, white teeth, and his eyes were glowing _yellow_. Not pretty. He smiled when he saw Kara—Supergirl—and stepped forward. “And here I was wondering when you’d show up.” Kara sneered at her as she glanced back at the restaurant. The people were leaving in a hoard, but she couldn’t see Winn. She tried to calm down as she looked back at the Fiery Hands, and straightened up.

“You didn’t think I’d let you hurt anyone, did you?” she asked in a mocking voice. “Cause that’s not gonna happen.” The man growled as he opened his palms, firing two fireballs. Kara didn’t think fire would hurt her—it usually didn’t—but she wasn’t sure of metahuman fire. Instead of letting the fire hit her, she spun around to get the civilians away from it as she avoided being burned. Pushing a young girl and her mother away, she stared into their eyes.

“Get everyone out of here. Now.” The woman looked like she could barely register what was going on, but she still nodded as Kara turned back to the Fiery Hands. She lurched on him with a punch, but the guy avoided it easily. Instead, he grabbed her arm easily and threw her to the ground.

Wow. Apparently his only power wasn’t throwing fire. He was also a hell of a lot stronger than normal humans.

Standing up easily, she swung her leg to hit the guy in the stomach. The guy stumbled back as she threw another kick, which send the guy flying to the restaurant’s window. It shattered. Luckily, it seemed like the restaurant was empty. Counting on that, she jumped on the man again, but before she could reach him, he threw a fireball. She barely avoided it as the fire hit a lamppost.

“Is that the best you can do?” she asked with a hiss as she grabbed him from the collar and pinned him against the wall. A smile appeared on her face, only to be erased when pain hit her in her stomach. She never felt anything like it. When she looked down, she realized her costume was burning. Supposedly fireproof costume.

Okay, so she was right about metahuman fire. It did hurt her.

Before she could put out the fire, the guy hit her with another fireball, and this time she was the one on the floor. The restaurant was burning around her as well as the man approached her with fire erupting from…everywhere. She coughed as she tried to stand up. Luckily, at least she wasn’t burning anymore. Yet, she could still feel the burning sensation. And the smoke? It almost made her blind. She blinked, but it was impossible to see.

“No, that’s not all I can do,” the guy said, kneeling down in front of her. She tried to lift her arm to punch the guy, of course if only she could lift her hand. “Maybe you aren’t as super as everyone thinks you are. You—“ Before the guy could finish his words, someone appeared behind him and knocked him out with a burning rod. Kara blinked as fire around her disappeared slowly as the guy fainted. She could see clearly right now.

It was Winn. He’d saved her life. And from his looks, he was hurt while doing so. The dizziness she had from the smoke suddenly disappeared as she sat up. “Winn!” she yelled, jumping to her feet to hold her friend before he crashed into the floor. Kara barely registered his torn jeans and burned t-shirt as she grabbed his face.

“Winn?” she whispered again as Winn blinked, looking at her face. Anxiety seeped into his features.

“Kara, you okay?” he said as he tried to reach for her. Kara grabbed his arm.

“Of course I’m okay. Fire doesn’t affect me.” She decided not to mention the part where it _affected_ her. Winn didn’t need to worry about her burning stomach. “You idiot. What were you thinking?” she asked as she got him on his feet. He was wobbly on his feet because of his injured knee, and it looked like there were minor burns here and there, but other than that he looked fine. He was alive.

That was what she reminded herself as tears welled up in her eyes. She activated her coms. “Alex, I need immediate medical assistance here.” She glanced at Winn. “Winn decided to play the hero and save my ass, and unfortunately he’s not fireproof as I am.” Alex’s voice was calm as always when there was a mission.

“Roger that.” She stopped for a second. “Is he okay?” she added.

“Well, he is alive,” Kara said, glaring at Winn as she took him out of the restaurant. Winn tried to smile but he was too tired for that. Ignoring the crowd gathering around the cafeteria, and therefore her, she quickly took Winn to one of the benches near. He almost collapsed onto the bench.

“What’s going on?” Kara heard one of the civilians around her ask.

“Who is he?”

“Is he Supergirl’s friend?”

“He looks really injured.”

“What happened in there?”

Kara quickly shut all the voices out, focusing on Winn who was holding his arm with the torn leather jacket that was stained with blood. “What were you thinking?” she asked again as quietly as possible. Winn tried to focus on her face.

“I… Saving your life. I couldn’t let you…face him alone.” Clenching her fists, Kara tried to keep herself from hitting Winn on the head to knock some sense into his brain.

“Face him alone? Winn, I’m an alien. I can handle myself. You’re just human.” Winn’s eyes were more determined than she’d ever seen when she looked into them.

“That doesn’t mean I can’t help you.” They would’ve probably continued the argument if it wasn’t for the ambulance noises coming from a distance. Kara stood up.

“This isn’t over,” she told Winn before wrapping her arms around his shoulders loosely. She shut her eyes. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

“Me too,” Winn whispered. “Me too.”

* * *

Kara stayed with Winn back at DOD as they patched him up, treated his wounds and burns, and gave him one of those hospital robes. Well, she wasn’t exactly in the room when Winn changed his clothes, but other than that she hadn’t left his side. And right now, as Winn slept on the bed peacefully, she was holding his hand and looking at his face, memorizing his features. She had almost lost him that night, and she still felt dread filling her stomach as the memories from the fight resurfaced.

She couldn’t let that happen. Especially because right now that she… She could admit her feelings for him weren’t limited to “friendship zone.” Sliding her fingers around his, she squeezed his hand as his eyes flickered open. She immediately straightened up. She didn’t even care she was wearing her Supergirl costume, or they were in DOD, or she hadn’t even showered. She was just glad to have her friend back.

“Winn?” she said tentatively, pushing his damp hair away from his face. Winn’s eyes focused on her slowly, and surprise filled his eyes. He frowned.

“Kara?” he whispered. Luckily, there was no one around. Not that Kara would care at that exact moment. The way he’d said her name sent shivers down her spine. He was tired, his voice was husky, but he was okay.

“You’re okay.” A grin spread on her face. “You’re okay.”

“I’m…okay? What are you talking about?” He looked around. “Why am I at DO— Oh,” he said as his eyes widened. “Oh.” Kara scowled at him.

“Yeah, oh. You’re here because your idiot ass decided to go up against a _metahuman_ to save me.” She leaned forward. “I know you’re into all this alien crap right now, but that doesn’t make you as strong or powerful as one of them. You could’ve been killed.” Kara remembered the metahuman being carried to the cell. She’d given him the glare of her life. She’d definitely rip his head off of she ever got the chance.

“I couldn’t let you die,” Winn said like it was nothing. Kara blinked.

“Winn, I’m an alien! A Kryptonian at that. Bullets, or fire, or falling down from twentieth floor doesn’t hurt me. But it hurts you. It can kill you,” she spelled out so that he’d understand. “And you were on a date!” Winn scoffed at that. Kara stopped for a second. “Wait, what was that scoff about?”

“The date didn’t go well.” Kara gave him a questioning look. She’d actually seen the photo of the girl—okay, multiple photos—okay, maybe she might’ve stalked her online a little—okay, she had totally stalked her online—and she honestly didn’t understand how a date with that girl could go wrong. She was beautiful with the slim kind of body Kara could never have even though calories didn’t really affect her.

“What happened?” she still asked softly. Winn sighed.

“You’d expect a psychologist to talk less about themselves.” He stopped for a second. “Okay, scratch that, she actually talked about her patients. It was all she talked about. You know how she answered when I asked her favorite movie? ‘Oh, one of my patients had recommended me I-don’t-remember-the-name, but I didn’t have time to check it out.’” Winn actually looked exasperated as Kara giggled, which earned a glare. “I’m serious.”

“Okay, I’m sorry,” she said but she was still smiling. “It was that bad?” Winn nodded.

“I mean, even you don’t do that and you’re the freaking Supergiri. I’m sure if we went on a date, you wouldn’t tie everything to your powers or something.” At first, Kara laughed, until she realized what Winn said. And the smile on her face disappeared immediately.

Holy aliens, did Winn just told her dating her wouldn’t be that bad? Of course the context wasn’t like an actual date, but her heart still stuttered. It seemed like Winn had realized what he’d said as well as his cheeks turned red and his eyes widened.

“I mean, not that we have to go on a date. It was just a figure of speech. Because you know, you don’t talk about all this a lot, which is way cooler than listening to people’s problems, and dysfunctional marriages, and friendship issues because one of the friends’ has changed their BFF or something like that. I was just saying…”

“I wouldn’t mind it,” Kara interrupted. She had no idea where she got the courage, but the words stumbled out of her mouth. Winn was so shocked that he froze with his mouth open.

“I’m sorry?” Kara shrugged.

“I wouldn’t mind going on a date with you either. It wouldn’t be that bad.” Winn looked at her dumfounded for another second before a smile illuminated his face. Kara’s heart doubled its beat, but before she could even say anything, Alex appeared in the doorway.

“Hey, Supergirl,” she said with a smile on her face. “We kind of need you right now, if that’s okay?” Kara, standing up, nodded.

“Yeah, I’m coming.” Alex turned to Winn.

“Good to see you awake. And thank you for saving Supergirl.” Alex sounded really grateful, but she immediately straightened up when she saw Kara’s glare. “But of course, if you do that again we might need to lock you up somewhere. You know, to keep you safe.” Winn smiled, but his eyes were still on Kara.

“I won’t. I promise.”

“Good,” Kara said with a huge grin. “Then let’s go.” Just as she and Alex were about to leave the room, she turned back to Winn. “By the way, I love steak too. But I’d prefer pizza.” She winked before leaving the room, but she still didn’t miss Winn’s smile.

* * *

_And you say, "Let’s run away now,_  
_I’ll meet you when I’m out of my tux at the back door._  
_Baby, I didn’t say my vows,_  
_So glad you were around_  
_When they said, "Speak now."_


	10. I Won't Give Up - Fitzsimmons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Jemma be able to come to terms with the change Fitz had gone through after Fitz saved her life in the ocean, or will her denial will widen the gap between them?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lovelies! So this is what happens when you got an inspiration in the middle of the day and you just can't stop writing, even though you have a ton of other things you have to do (like studying psychology because you have an exam next week). But of course, I had to write, write, write. I hope you like this short but cute Fitzsimmons fic. It takes place after Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 2x12, but I have to say, I haven't really watched season 2 attentively, so if there's anything that seems out of place or I forgot something mentioned in the show, yep, that's totally my fault. But honestly, since the show had already became shitty after season 1, I hope you can forgive me :) 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like it, and don't forget to leave your requests in the comments! Love you all!!!
> 
> Song: I Won't Give Up by Jason Mraz  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Fitzsimmons

_I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily_  
_I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make_  
_Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use_  
_The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stake_

_And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend_  
_For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn_  
_We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in_  
_I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am_

* * *

Fitz didn’t know how long he’d been standing in the middle of the bathroom, staring at the mirror. He just needed to be alone for a while, after they cleaned up the mess Skye made when her powers were unleashed. He didn’t even want to think about the conversation he had with the team, and how they treated Skye.

They treated her like she was a threat, when they were supposed to be helping her. Wasn’t that what real families did? Smile with each other in good times and stay by each other’s side in bad times? Help through them, no matter how hard it was?

S.H.I.E.L.D. was Skye’s family. For someone who felt like she never belonged anywhere, Fitz could understand her. She wanted to belong somewhere, to be accepted, and she’d found that in the organization. In their team. And now her family was turning their backs on her.

 _We’re the ones that need protection from her._ That was what they’d said. Rage bubbled up in his chest again with the thought of his team locking up Skye, one of his best friends. It was right, Skye was dangerous now, but locking her up? It wouldn’t help with her case. She needed to learn her powers, not by being shut out or locked up, but by guidance, by standing by her no matter what and supporting her. That was all he was trying to do.

 _You lied to me._ Jemma’s words shot through his heart like a bullet. Well, he knew it was nothing like a bullet, since a bullet to the heart would kill him in a few minutes if not instantly, but it felt as painful as that. At least Fitz assumed. He’d never been hit by a bullet to the heart.

But there was a reason he lied. He wouldn’t just lie to Jemma for no good reason. She’d talked about Raina like she was a _thing_ to be eliminated rather than a real person. He knew, more or less, that her reaction to Skye would be much different. At least he hoped. He couldn’t risk Skye, though, based on assumptions and hopes. And Jemma hadn’t shown solid evidence she’d been fine with change.

That didn’t mean he didn’t feel lonely. Ever since Jemma left… Left him to go undercover in HYDRA, right after he was starting to recover after the incident, he couldn’t cope with it. Now without his best friend. The… The woman he loved.

And she’d known. She knew he loved her before she left. They never really talked about it, but Fitz knew if Jemma felt anything for him, she’d have said it.

“Fitz?” With Jemma’s voice coming from the door, Fitz stiffened but hadn’t turned to her. He quickly pretended to be washing his hands.

“I’m… I’m leaving now. You can just…” He cursed himself for not even being able to form a decent sentence.

“No, I… I wanted to talk to you.” She stepped into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. Fitz’s heart skipped a beat, but he quickly got a handle on that. “About what you said.”

“We don’t need to talk about that,” Fitz rushed the words out before they got stuck in his throat again. Drying his hand with the towel, he finally turned to Jemma to face her. His eyes were still glued to floor though.

“Fitz, you barely talked to me since I came back. Please…”

“What’s… Um, what-what’s there to talk about?” he stuttered. “You made your…your in-intentions quite clear when you left.” His eyes were teary when he lifted them to look at Simmons. Her eyes were filled with pain. “You didn’t want me. Not… Not in that way.”

“No, Fitz,” Simmons whispered slowly. “I didn’t leave because I didn’t want you. I left because…” She shut her eyes and took a deep breath. “I left because I wanted you too much.” Fitz froze with her words. It was the first time she’d been this open to him since the incident. Since he sacrificed his life to save her. He just never expected her words. “I cared about you too much that I didn’t want you to change. I didn’t want to see you change.” She stepped forward and looked up. “I couldn’t accept the fact that you were struggling this much with something you’ve been excellent at because of me.” Fitz was at a loss of words, literally, and it had nothing to do with what happened to him. “That’s why I left. I didn’t want to see what I cost you.”

“I don’t regret that,” he said slowly, choosing his words carefully. Jemma laughed, but it wasn’t a happy laugh.

“I know, Fitz. But I do. I should’ve done something about it.”

“Hey,” Fitz interrupted, stepping forward. “You… You-you couldn’t have done anything. It was… It wasn’t your fault.” Jemma bit her lip.

“I’m sorry,” she said as she looked up. “I’m sorry I tried to stay away from you. I’m sorry I couldn’t accept that you changed. I wanted you to be the same. I wanted to believe in time, you’d go back to the way you were because I knew… I thought that was the person you wanted to be.” Fitz had actually hoped more than several times he could be like he used to, but he didn’t say that. He didn’t need Jemma to feel worse than she apparently was. “So I tried to change you. Tried to act like you were the old Fitz, because it was the only way I could cope with what happened to you. I’m sorry, Fitz, if I hurt you. I’m sorry if I made you think I didn’t care about you anymore. I’m sorry if I made you think you changed for worse. You didn’t. It just… It made me feel like a monster for not being able to do anything about it. For not having done anything about it when you decided to save me.”

“Jemma…” Fitz said quietly, wrapping his arms around his best friends. For the first time in a long time, he didn’t feel bad for not having anything to say. There were no words necessary as Jemma hugged him back, burying her face to Fitz’s shoulder. He could feel her tears wetting his shirt, but he didn’t care. He shut his eyes too, just letting himself relax in the arms of Jemma, whom he’d missed deeply. Yes, they’d been seeing each other pretty frequently for the last few weeks—they lived in the _same_ place—but this was different. He’d missed their friendship. Her support. Her ability to finish his sentences for her, knowing exactly what he was thinking. Her brilliant ideas when it came to science. Her fierce love and loyalty for her team and friends.

And he knew, somehow, that it’d be fine. They’d be fine.

Jemma pulled back after what felt like minutes, and wiped her tears away. “Thank you,” she whispered in a hoarse voice. “For forgiving me.” Fitz smiled.

“You… You’re my best friend,” he said. Jemma shot him a look that almost seemed like a glare, but before he could decide, she’d leaned down, pressing her lips on his. It was a small kiss, not passionate at all, but even more beautiful in the soft, sweet and accepting way of it. Somehow, without even needing the confirmation words, Fitz knew Jemma accepted the new him. And he knew she’d accept Skye too, given time.

He’d gotten his friend back, but he’d also gotten more than that. He was smiling when their lips parted, and he could see Jemma was returning his smile.

“Apology… Apology accepted,” he whispered breathlessly. His stutter had nothing to do with his condition, but more about his pounding heart. “And thank you. For acce-accepting me.” Jemma rolled her eyes as she ran her fingers through Fitz’s hair.

“You don’t need to thank me, ever,” she said before hugging him again. She didn’t say anything for a second. “I’m gonna be with you no matter what after today, okay?” Fitz nodded. And at that moment, he felt truly happy, even though there was a ton of problems waiting for them.

In that moment, nothing else existed but Jemma and him, and he’d finally found himself again. He was finally whole again.

* * *

_Well, I won't give up on us_  
_Even if the skies get rough_  
_I'm giving you all my love_  
_I'm still looking up_


	11. Already Gone - Snowells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One moment with intense emotions led Harry and Caitlin into a kiss that both of them couldn't forget. So how will Caitlin react when she learns Harry is going back to Earth 2?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry this chapter took some time, but I literally stared at the page for full two days only being able to write one paragraph. Still, I really like how this turned out, so I hope you liked it too! It's my first time writing about Snowells, so I hope I didn't mess up badly lol.
> 
> Song: Already Gone by Sleeping At Last  
> TV Show: The Flash  
> Fandom: Snowells (Caitlin&Earth 2 Harrison)

_Remember all the things we wanted_   
_Now all our memories, they're haunted_   
_We were always meant to say goodbye_

_* * *_

_Looking at you makes it harder_   
_But I know that you'll find another_   
_That doesn't always make you wanna cry_

_* * *_

_You know that I love you so_   
_I love you enough to let you go_

* * *

Caitlin knew as soon as Barry introduced the team to Harrison Wells of Earth 2, her life wasn’t going to be the same. Not only this man bore the face of the man that caused Eddie and Ronnie’s deaths, betrayed them in the worst way possible, and killed Barry’s mother, she wasn’t even sure she could trust him, even though she knew he was a completely different person from the Harrison Wells, or Eobard Thawne, that they knew. She thought Harry would break their love and trust again, just like Eobard did. She expected that even.

What she didn’t expect was to feel anything to the man other than distrust. In the end, Harry had not betrayed the team, but it wasn’t just that. She could never have imagined falling for Harrison Wells of their Earth, the closed off man that sometimes seemed almost crazy because of his genius. Well, he did end up being crazy—who’d go back in time to kill their arch nemesis who, in a way, created them—but that wasn’t the matter. Doctor Wells was always way too emotionless and unsympathetic for her. Harry, on the other hand, was different. Yes, there were times he seemed like the lives of others didn’t matter to him, but it wasn’t the case at all. He cared. And he showed it. He cared about his daughter so much to risk his life for her. He cared about Barry that he risked his daughter’s life for him. He cared about the team, a lot more than Caitlin initially thought, that he did everything to make sure they were safe. He stayed with them when he didn’t have to. He helped them when he didn’t have to. And along the way, Caitlin had developed feelings for him without even realizing.

Well, she did realize them. The problem was, it was only now that it occurred to her as her chest squeezed when Harry told the team he and Jesse were leaving. She should’ve expected that. She knew. Earth 2 was their home, and now that it was safe from Zoom, there was no reason they wouldn’t return there.

She stared at the mirror in the bathroom of the lab, faking a smile. She was doing it pretty often to make sure her smile didn’t look fake. She wanted to be happy for Harry and Jesse. They would get their earth back. They would be happy. Hell, maybe Harry could even find someone else, be with her, form a new and happy family. And… And she’d be okay, too. She’d known what loss was like. No matter what it felt like at first, it always passed. You never really forgot, but you moved on. You stopped thinking about it every second, and rather it became once a few hours. And then once a day, especially before sleeping. And then suddenly, it became once a week, and it wasn’t painful anymore. Rather, you started to remember the time you had spent with that person with a smile on your face rather than a throb in your heart. And you started to feel grateful you’d known them. That was when you moved on without even realizing.

Knowing that didn’t mean it made anything easier. In fact, Caitlin still felt like she’d never be able to get over it. Why did she think she could ever do it anyway? It was ridiculous.

Taking a deep breath, she shook her head. No. She couldn’t think like that. She couldn’t let Harry know how much it bothered her. They never really established their relationship. They hadn’t even put a name to it. One kiss—one, _desperate_ kiss—didn’t mean anything. She’d just ran away from Zoom. She was way too happy to be free, and Harry was way too relieved to have her back. They were emotional, not exactly in the right mind, and it had just happened when they were alone. It was the spur of the moment. Caitlin tried not to think about it. It had worked, too. With the metahuman attack, Earth 2 Laurel, aka Black Siren coming, Barry’s father…dying, and Zoom trying to destroy the _multi_ verse, she didn’t exactly have time to ponder over her relationship problems.

Taking a deep breath, she blinked again and forced another smile, staring at herself until it looked real enough. She’d done it too many times that she almost got used to it. If she tried hard enough, she could even convince herself that it was real.

She’d grabbed her make up bag and got out of the bathroom before someone realized she was gone way too long. And it probably would’ve been fine…if she hadn’t crashed into Harry right at that second. She was caught too off guard that she couldn’t even fake _anything_ as she looked up. “Harry!” she exclaimed as she looked up at the older scientist. Harry’s eyes filled with pain as he realized who was in front of him.

“Caitlin,” he said and cleared his throat. “I was just looking for you.” Caitlin’s shoulders stiffened and she took a step back. No. She wasn’t ready to have this conversation. Well, okay, she was never ready to have this conversation. She was hoping her goodbye would be stuffed between many of them, especially when the rest of the team were there, so she could pretend Harry was nothing but a friend—and maybe a mentor—for her. She couldn’t do it right now.

Especially since she could see oh-so clearly in Harry’s eyes that he remembered the kiss, and pondered on it, at least as much as she did.

Trying to step back, Caitlin forced the smile back on her face. She was hoping it didn’t look like a grimace. “I was just… I mean, I wanted to wash my face and all. It was hard couple of days.” Pressing her lips together, she forced herself to shut up. It was probably the lamest excuse she’d ever heard.

“That’s more than just an understatement, Caitlin.” Caitlin’s breath hitched in her throat. Harry never called her Caitlin. She was Snow to him. Except… Except when they kissed. Then he’d called her Caitlin. Said her name in a way that still made her shiver when she thought about it.

It probably wasn’t a good time to think about _that_.

“I’ll get through it,” she said with a shrug. “It’s not much really compared to what I’ve been through.” Harry shot her a look, but she knew he understood. They’d been through too much together.

“You’re strong, Caitlin. You’ll be okay.” He put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed it. Caitlin let herself relax with her touch for just a moment, without worrying about anything but present. She was so stressed for weeks that she needed it. So even though she knew it couldn’t last, or she’d never see Harry ever again, she let him comfort her.

“I know. It’ll take time, but…I’ll be.” At least she _hoped_. Harry didn’t say anything for a moment, his intense gaze on Caitlin, and she had to shift uncomfortable. She was just about to say it was better if they returned to the cortex, with the team, that Harry spoke.

“We need to talk.” _No_. That was Caitlin’s first thought. They did not need to talk. Not at all. It was…better if Harry just left without talking about anything. It’d be over anyway. What were they going to _talk about_?

“About what?” she asked, forcing a laugh. Playing stupid with Harry was…stupid, but she didn’t want to think about the alternative. Harry shut his eyes as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Don’t act like you don’t know. We need to talk about what happened between us before I leave.”

“No.” The word left Caitlin’s mouth before she could stop herself. “We don’t have to talk about it. It…wouldn’t mean anything.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Harry said as he stepped forward, and put his hands on Caitlin’s shoulders. “It means a whole lot.” He took a deep breath. “After my wife died, I never though I could move on, let alone find someone else.” _Until you_. He hadn’t said those words, but it didn’t take a genius to guess. Caitlin took a deep breath as she tried to calm her heart.

“But you’re not staying,” she whispered. She didn’t mean to say it accusingly, it wasn’t like he had a choice, but Harry still winced. “I’m not saying because I’m angry. It’s understandable. Earth 2 is your earth. It’s where your life is, your family is. And… And this is my earth.” It wasn’t like Harry was the only one who was choosing to go. In a way, she was choosing to be away from him by staying as well.

“If you want me to stay, I will,” Harry whispered as he pushed Caitlin’s hair away from her face. “We can find a way to work it out. We…”

“I’m not asking you to stay,” Caitlin said hoarsely. “I care too much about you for that. This was never going to work out anyway. We live in different earths.” She took a deep breath. “But… But I don’t want you to think about me,” she continued, choosing her words carefully. Harry frowned.

“What are you talking about?” he asked. Caitlin bit her lip.

“Move on. Just like you did with your life. Move on from me too, and find someone else. Someone that can make you happy. You deserve that. Jesse deserves that.” She dropped her chin, not being able to face Harry. It wasn’t fair to ask him to do that when she thought it’d be impossible for her. But that was all she had.

“You deserve that too,” Harry said finally. When Caitlin lifted her eyes, she realized there was surrender and pain in his eyes. “Promise me you’ll move on and be happy too.” It took Caitlin more than ten seconds to answer, but finally she managed to nod. Harry cupped her cheeks as he nodded as well, his eyes glued to somewhere behind Caitlin. And then, in a second, he wrapped her in his embrace and pressed his lips on hers. It was so unexpected for Caitlin that for a moment she couldn’t do anything other than gasping. It took her two seconds to realize Harry was _kissing_ her. All the conversation about moving on flew out of the window as she parted her lips and leaned into Harry, losing herself in him. His fingers were trailing up and down her arms, her back, her shoulder, her hair, and she was doing the same. Memorizing every piece of the man she doubted she’d see again.

When their lips parted, she could still feel Harry’s lips on hers as her lips tingled. Taking a deep breath, she stepped back with tears in her eyes. They both looked at each other without touching for a few seconds. And then Caitlin cleared her throat.

“We better go,” she whispered. Harry nodded without saying anything. They both started walking to the cortex, knowing it’d be the last time they’d see each other. Yet, Caitlin still didn’t push his hand away as he held hers and locked their fingers.

* * *

 

The following morning, Caitlin woke up with sunlight on his face. A smile pulled her lips. Obviously, the man lying beside her had again forgot to draw the curtains. Turning around, she faced his husband, who was still sleeping soundlessly even though they had to go to work in an hour. But that was Ronnie Raymond. And it was one of the reasons she loved him and married him.

She couldn’t picture herself with anyone else anyway.

* * *

 

_I want you to know_   
_That it doesn't matter_   
_Where we take this road_   
_But someone's gotta go_   
_And I want you to know_   
_You couldn't have loved me better_   
_But I want you to move on_   
_So I'm already gone_


	12. The One That Got Away - Skyeward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the middle of a fight with Inhumans, Skye finds herself back on the Bus, only to be faced with a surprise: Ward isn't a traitor and they're together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I know this chapter took some time, but honestly every time I said I'm done, something came to my mind and I added something. Sooooo yeah, it's almost 4000 words. Not surprising :) But to be honest, the moment I heard this song on Spotify, Skye and Ward immediately came to my mind because lyrics fit them perfectly. So I decided to put my spin on it. I also got inspired by the idea of multiverse in the Flash, and tried to reflect the characters as well as possible. I hope I did a good job lol. Please tell me what you think about it!
> 
> Song: The One That Got Away by Katy Perry  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Skyeward

_In another life_  
_I would be your girl_  
_We'd keep all our promises_  
_Be us against the world_  
  
_In another life_  
_I would make you stay_  
_So I don't have to say_  
_You were the one that got away_

* * *

Skye woke up with a crippling headache, her back on a rough surface. Grunting, she straightened up and opened her eyes. She was in a room that looked really familiar in a way, but unfamiliar in others. How did she come here? All she remembered was S.H.I.E.L.D. fighting Inhumans, and she’d been caught in the crossfire. She remembered being absorbed by a illuminating white light and she’d fainted, only to find herself in her bedroom of the Bus. How did she get here, she had no idea. And she also didn’t know why the room looked like somebody had been living in it for _months_. She hadn’t _been_ on the Bus for months. But she was pretty sure this was her room, even if there weren’t photos of her and the team on the walls. The bed was unmade, there was a computer and a number of chargers for every kind of electronic device on the small table, clothes were sprawled on the bed and the suitcase next to it. Yep, this was definitely her room.

But it also wasn’t her room, because at least two thirds of the photos on the walls had one person in the world she hated for breaking her heart, for betraying been them in many ways, who threw Fitz and Simmons to the sea, and who was ready to kill all of them if he had the chance. Grant Ward.

No. This definitely couldn’t be her room because she and Grant… They looked like a couple. There were pictures of them hugging, pictures of kisses on cheeks, on hair, on _lips,_ pictures of them dancing and training, with PJs and expensive dresses, on the Bus and in a café or a restaurant… Basically, the wall of pictures showed a clear picture of their relationship, and it was so not true. He was HYDRA, he was a traitor and a serial killer. He wasn’t…whoever these photos made him look like.

She jumped to her feet when she heard someone knocking on the door. Before she even heard the familiar voice, she had her gun out and pointed to the door. She had a number of questions to ask, but she wouldn’t hesitate to shoot if it came to that. She’d done it once, she could do it again.

“Skye?” Ward said with a soft voice he sometimes used before…everything. Skye shivered but she didn’t let her anxiety show on her face. The door slowly opened, revealing Ward in his black tight t-shirt and jeans. His hair was messy, like he’d just woken up, even though she knew it wasn’t the case. The clock in the room said it was around 9 a.m. Ward _never_ slept after 7:30.

“Stop right there,” Skye hissed the moment Ward stepped in. His eyes widened in surprise as he stared at her.

“Skye?” His voice was barely a whisper. Skye made sure her stance was strong and unwavering as she pointed at Ward’s belt with the gun.

“Drop the gun on the floor and put your hands in the air.” She had to keep him at gunpoint because she knew the moment he saw an advantage. Ward stood still as he looked at Skye’s eyes with fear, trying to understand what was going on probably. Did he really not know? Or was he still playing stupid after everything. “Now!” she yelled when he didn’t move. Wincing, Ward reached for his gun with slightly trembling fingers.

“Skye, what’s going on? What did I do?” Skye couldn’t help a strangled laugh.

“You’re really asking me that?” When the gun was on the floor and Ward’s hands were in the air, she squared her shoulders. “Where’s Coulson and the others?”

“I-in the lab, I think,” Ward stuttered. Skye stopped for a second. It was probably the first time she heard him stutter. Even after he found out she knew he was HYDRA, even when he was in the cell and she went down to talk to him, he never stuttered. But right now, he looked more scared than any time she’d seen him before. “Skye, please, what happened? I—“

“Shut up!” Skye yelled, her fiery gaze pointed at Grant. “Take me to Coulson. Right now.” Ward opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, but then he decided against it and turned around. His shoulders were taut as Skye lifted the gun to point it at his head. “One wrong move, and I won’t hesitate to shoot.”

They walked silently for a few seconds as they exited the room. Skye had thought Ward would keep his composure no matter what, but no. It was obvious from the way his shoulders were slumped, his hands were shaking and his steps were faltered that he was affected. He gulped.

“Skye, whatever you think is going on, or whatever you think I did, it’s not true. I’d… I’d never hurt you.” Skye scoffed.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that before,” she hissed. “I don’t know what you did to change the past, but I promise you I won’t let it stick.” That made Ward stop for a second.

“The past? What are you ta—“

“Shut up!” Skye yelled. “Shut up and continue walking.” Ward jerked with her yell, but he still continued. It took them at least thirty seconds to go down to the lab, and thoughts hadn’t left Skye’s head during that time. How the hell did Ward managed to change the past? And if he did, what time they were in right now? Right when Coulson accepted her on the team? Later? Just before HYDRA took down S.H.I.E.L.D. and they were labeled a terrorist organization? And again, how the hell did Ward managed to do that?

When they were downstairs, right in front of the lab, Skye glanced in and saw that Ward was right. FitzSimmons and Coulson were in the lab, talking over some schematics of what looked like a weapon. Ward cleared his throat as he entered.

“Coulson…” he said in a strained voice as Skye revealed herself, her gun still pointed at Ward’s head. Her eyes never turned away from him.

A commotion rose in the room with the scene in front of them. Simmons gasped as she covered her mouth with her hand, and Fitz’s eyes were widened. He dropped the device that was in his hand.

“There’s something we need to talk about right now,” Skye started, glancing at Coulson. His hand was on the gun tucked in his pants, but he looked confused, like he didn’t know what to do.

“Skye? What’s going on?” Skye took a deep breath.

“Don’t ask me how I know it, but Ward isn’t who he pretends to be.” She scowled at Ward. “He’s an agent of HYDRA,” she spat out. Ward shook his head only slightly, but no word left his mouth. He looked resigned almost.

There was a silence for a second until FitzSimmons broke it. “What? No, that’s impossible,” Simmons said, and Fitz backed her up.

“Yeah, he saved our lives several times. He jumped out of a plane for me!”

“He also fought with us against HYDRA. Why would he do that if he was?”

“And you and him—“

“Stop,” Coulson said quietly, but the look on his face and the tone of his voice was enough to shut the scientists up. Their fearful gazes went back and forth to Skye and Ward, and Coulson. “Skye, how do you know he’s HYDRA?” Skye bit back a retort.

“Because of his S.O. Garrett. He’d manipulated Ward into becoming a HYDRA killing machine.” Bitterness dripped from her words. Not that she cared.

“Garrett? John Garrett, you mean?” Skye gaped at Coulson.

“Is there another Garrett I need to be worried about?” Coulson looked at Skye like she grew another head.

“Skye, John Garrett died on a mission seventeen years ago. I’m surprised you even know his name.” Coulson’s voice was soft as he stepped forward, yet it still made Skye freeze in her place. She glanced at Coulson.

“What do you mean he’s dead? He was the one who recruited Ward.” Was it possible that Grant changed the past that much that early?

“Coulson recruited me,” Ward said quietly. “I’ve never met Garrett.” He stopped, looking at Coulson with pleading eyes. Coulson nodded slightly before turning to Skye.

“He’s right, Skye. It’s true, Garrett had been following Ward’s improvement in military school. That was why I recruited him after he died. It was a part of his mission.” Skye was torn as she looked at the man she considered a father, and then to the man that broke her heart so badly it still hadn’t healed. Her grip on the gun loosened, and at that second someone barged in through the door.

“Hey guys, sorry I’m late, May—“ The agent entering the room stopped at the scene in front of her. And everyone in the room froze as their eyes turned to the door. Skye gasped with shock as she saw who came in. It was her. It was another Skye.

The gun dropped from her hands as her mouth opened. Okay, what was going on really? “Holy crap, did someone clone me or something?” the other Skye said as her eyes traveled around the room. “I mean, it’s a pretty big accomplishment, but still…”

“Skye?” Fitz said, stepping forward. Ward’s eyes were wide as they traveled between the two Skye’s. Everyone in the room looked baffled. “Wait, who is the real Skye?” Understanding seeped into Ward’s eyes as he suddenly made his move to Skye. She was expecting it, of course, seen it before it even happened. Training with May paid off. She quickly and efficiently ducked his punch and swung his leg. Before it could contact Ward’s side, he grabbed it from the ankle and threw her on the ground. In seconds, she found her back pressed to the wall, Ward’s arm on her neck.

“Ward!” Simmons yelled. “What are you doing to Skye?”

“She’s not Skye,” Ward hissed. His eyes filled with fear just a few minutes ago were filled with anger now. “Who are you?”

“I’m Skye, you son of a bitch!” She tried to push him back but it didn’t work. “I don’t know what’s going on here, but I know who I am!” She glanced at the other Skye, looking at them.

“Whoa, whoa, okay,” she said, lifting her hands. “What’s going on here?”

“She—whoever she is—pointed a gun at me and claimed I was HYDRA,” Grant spat out. Skye narrowed her eyes at him.

“That’s ridiculous,” the other Skye said, taking her place next to Ward. “Grant isn’t HYDRA. I’ve known him for eight years. It’s impossible.” Skye stopped, looking at Ward, the other Skye, and the rest of the team. She pressed her lips together.

“He must’ve changed the past,” she said, pointing at Ward. “Put me in a polygraph if you want. I’m not lying.” Silence stretched before Coulson stepped forward.

“Let Skye go, Ward,” he said. Ward looked at him incredulously.

“She’s not _Skye_ ,” he said, emphasizing his words. Coulson looked thoughtful as his eyes rested on Ward.

“I think that she is. Just not the version we know.” After his words, Ward slowly stepped back and immediately went next to the other Skye. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her to herself. The other Skye didn’t even resist as she leaned on Ward’s shoulder, eyeing Skye curiously.

“What does that mean?” Fitz asked. “Not the version we know?”

“Maybe HYDRA cloned her,” Simmons proposed. Coulson shook her head.

“What do you guys think about alternate universes?”

* * *

Grant held Skye tightly as he watched the scene unfolding in front of her. After Coulson proposed his theory about alternate universes, and the Skye that pointed a gun at him was from an alternate universe, they all went to the briefing room and Skye sat in the middle, looking blankly at the table. She refused to look at him and his Skye. Every time she glanced at them, a painful expression appeared in her eyes.

She thought he was HYDRA. Does that mean—and if the multiverse theory was correct—in her universe he was HYDRA? He didn’t even want to think about that possibility. He tightened his arm around his Skye and put a little kiss on her head. Skye looked up.

“You are very affectionate, Agent Ward,” she whispered. “What did she tell you?” Ward shivered as he remembered the moment he entered Skye’s room and saw the gun pointed at his head by the woman he loved. He didn’t even realize the small differences between his Skye and the other Skye. Yes, he might’ve been a specialist once, and he was trained to notice the details, but he’d been caught too off guard and… And it was Skye. When it came to her, his thinking was compromised. Not that he cared. He wouldn’t give up Skye for anything. He even gave up being a Specialist and went back to being a Field Agent for her. That way they could stick together.

Seeing The hate in Skye’s eyes, her hate for him, it was his nightmare. First couple of months they started dating, he thought one day Skye would leave him because of his past and what did. She didn’t, and that fear diminished in time, but it had resurfaced since the other Skye came.

“How did you end up here?” Coulson asked the other Skye again. She lifted her head and looked at Coulson blankly.

“I don’t know,” she said finally. “We were fighting Inhumans—gifted people—and suddenly there was a blinding light before I found myself in Skye’s room.” She took a deep breath before half turning to Grant. Her body was facing him, but her eyes were on the table still. “I’m sorry for pointing a gun at you. If I…knew who you were, I wouldn’t.”

“What happened?” Skye couldn’t help asking, facing her doppelganger—was that what she was called. “I mean, between you and your Grant?” The doppelganger laughed but it was far from happy. She lifted her eyes.

“I always knew him as Agent Ward, you know.” She shook her head. “I loved Grant Ward of my earth. And he broke my heart in the worst way possible.” Everyone waited for her to continue as her hands closed into fists. “What’s the date?” It was Fitz who answered.

“23rd of April, 2015.”

“Then it means it was two years ago when Ward and I first met,” the doppelganger Skye said. Grant frowned. “I was hacking into S.H.I.E.L.D. servers and Coulson caught me. He and Ward came to pick me up.” She lifted her head. “Instead of throwing me into a cell, Coulson recruited me into his team.”

“That’s close to how we met, actually,” his Skye said, looking up at Grant. “But it was way before then.”

“Yeah. She was twenty and I had just graduated from the Academy. She was my first assignment as a Specialist. And yeah, she had hacked into S.H.I.E.L.D.” He couldn’t help a smile.

“And Agent Ward here took me in. You were actually excited.” Skye frowned at him. For a moment, he forgot they had an audience.

“It was my first assignment, Skye, and I completed it successfully without a fight. Though I have to admit, I didn’t expect a teenager with a laptop she won at a bet to hack into S.H.I.E.L.D. so I expected a fight.” Skye shrugged.

“I’m just _that good._ ” She turned back to the other Skye, and that was when he realized she was watching them with a grimace. She didn’t even try to hide it. Grant suddenly felt uncomfortable.

“What happened after that?” Coulson asked to change the subject.

“We were a team. But then it turned out John Garrett, Ward’s supervising officer in my Earth, was HYDRA, and Ward was his protégé. He betrayed the team for Garrett, almost killed Fitz and Simmons, killed Agent Koenig, and hurt many more when he escaped custody.” Skye gulped painfully. “The man I once thought was a loyal agent who’d do anything to protect the people he cared about turned out to be a murderous lying traitor, and everything we’ve ever been through was a lie.” No one said anything for a moment. Grant was speechless. Even just the thought of hurting Skye in any way made him feel revolted, and this other Skye from another universe was telling that in another universe, he actually was a serial killer that hurt Skye so badly she couldn’t recover? He didn’t want to believe that. He didn’t want to believe any version of him could do something like that. It felt like a badly written plot twist.

“Grant isn’t like that,” his Skye said finally. Her voice was confident as she held onto Grant. When their fingers locked, Grant’s eyes fell to the tattoos on their wrists. He smiled. They’d gotten them after one year of dating. On his wrist, there was an open bird cage, and on Skye’s there was a flying, free bird. It symbolized their freedom from their painful pasts as they overcame it together. Without each other, they might’ve been miserable.

And if what this other Skye said was true, then it looked like he’d be more than just miserable. He’d be a monster.

“I’m sorry for what your Grant did to you, but this Grant? He’s a good guy. Yeah, he might be a jerk most of the time, but he risked his life for me and for countless others, strangers, civilians for more than several times. He saved the lives of everyone on this team more than once. And he did everything to make me happy. He gave up being a Specialist for me. He joined this team for me. He stuck by my side no matter what.” She looked up at Grant. “He’d never hurt me.” A smile appeared on Grant’s face with Skye’s unwavering trust and belief in him. Not just then, but also before when the other Skye suggested that Grant was HYDRA. She dismissed the idea immediately, even labeling it as ridiculous. Sometimes, he suspected he didn’t deserve that faith.

“I can see that,” the other Skye said with a strained voice. “And again, I’m sorry.” And with that, she left, leaving the team behind confused.

* * *

The Bus had touched the ground only a few hours after the awkward conversation in the briefing room, and Skye was glad. It had been really hard to be in the Bus with the team again. Not that she didn’t like any of them, but… But it reminded her so much of the first year they’d been together, going to one mission after another, fighting bad guys, but also all the jokes and smiles and laughs and…and good times they’d spent together generally. She hadn’t realized how much she missed it. Ever since Ward’s betrayal and Fitz’s…condition, they couldn’t become a team again. Each of them had fallen apart inside, and no matter how much they tried it couldn’t be fixed. Not that they didn’t love each other. They did, and Skye was sure each of them would still give up their loves for the team, but the dynamic had changed. They weren’t a family anymore. The best way she could describe her current team was probably coworkers. And it was damn painful.

That was why the moment they landed, she’d went out from the bus to the sunny summer air. She had no idea where they were, though the guessed it was one of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s bases. Apparently, in this world HYDRA hadn’t taken over and destroyed S.H.I.E.L.D. It was the other way around. And S.H.I.E.L.D. was standing, not labeled a terrorist organization, which explained how Coulson and the team could fly around oh so comfortably.

“You don’t have to leave, you know.” Skye turned around, facing Coulson who’d just exited behind her. She wrapped her arms around her waist.

“I know,” she said, nodding. “And it’s not that I don’t trust you or the rest of the team. In whatever universe I’m in, you’ll be my friends.” She took a deep breath as she turned forward again.

“We can help you, Skye, to get back to your universe. We can figure it out together.” A smile pulled Skye’s lips, but it was a sad one.

“I know you can. But it’s better if I just find the Inhumans. Assuming they exist here.” She cleared her throat. “Besides, I can contact you if something goes wrong.”

“I know you can find a way.” Coulson stayed silent for a second, watching the sunset with Skye. She realized he wanted to ask something, but he was scared. He gave up in the end.

“Something you said about your universe… Your team had fallen apart.” Biting her lip, Skye nodded. “And Ward…”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Skye said, shaking her head.

“I’m sorry. I’m just curious, because you said it was about Garrett. You said he was HYDRA. But he was my friend, Skye.”

“Trust me, that was what we all thought,” Skye said with a hysterical laugh. “We all though he and Ward were good guys. It turned out, it was far from it. Garrett had me shot, almost causing my death. And Ward just watched, without doing anything, and he went along with it. They got you tortured for information. They’re the bad guys. At least in my universe.” She pressed her lips together. “I would want to stay, but it’s too painful. To see the team and… And Skye and Ward like that… It’s just too painful, because it reminds me of what we could’ve had. If Ward wasn’t a traitor. If S.H.I.E.L.D. hadn’t fell. If we managed to stick together. You guys… You’re like a true functioning family. We aren’t like that anymore. We constantly fight each other, let alone working together. It just doesn’t seem possible anymore.” She ran her fingers through her hair. “And Ward and Skye… They truly love each other. They’re like the epitome of a perfect couple. You should’ve seen Ward’s expression when I held a gun at him. Normally, if it had been my Ward, he’d have realized it wasn’t me right away. I mean, it wasn’t his Skye. But he was too scared that he couldn’t even pay attention to that. He loves Skye so much, and it’s not dysfunctional. Everything about my Ward and me was dysfunctional.

“So yeah, it’s hard being around the team, not because I don’t love you but because I miss the relationship you guys have. And if I stay, I’ll get used to it, and I can’t have that. Once I get used to it, it’ll be harder to lose it all over again when I go back. I just can’t risk it.” She glanced at Coulson. “I don’t know if that makes sense, but…”

“It does,” Coulson said softly, and then hugged Skye. “I’m sorry for everything you’ve been through, Skye. But remember, if you ever want to stay, you have a home here. Okay? No matter what universe you’re from, you’re our family as well.” Skye smiled sadly as tears threatened her eyes.

“Thank you, A.C.,” she said, using the nickname she gave him two years ago. Coulson scoffed.

“You know, Skye here calls me that too.” Skye was smiling as she pulled back. “Goodbye, Skye. And…good luck.” Skye shook her head before she walked away, not looking back. If she looked back, she might turn around and stay, and it wouldn’t be good. She had to go back.

Even though she was pretty sure she’d be happier here, in a world she didn't even belong.


	13. Waited Too Long - Kara&Winn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara realizes her feelings for Winn may be stronger than she thought when she sees him with his new girlfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!! I know it's been some time, but I've been in a summer camp and my school started immediately after it. I'm so so sorry for the wait, but here's the new chapter. I hope you like it! 
> 
> Song: Waited Too Long by Brett Eldredge  
> TV Show: Supergirl  
> Fandom: Kara&Winn

_I was so foolish thinkin' you'd be_  
_Happy just sittin' round waitin' on me_  
_It really put me in my place_  
_When you closed the door in my face_

 _And I_  
_I sure spent a lot of time_  
_All makin' up my mind_  
_Once I finally figured out where I belong_  
_I waited too long_

* * *

Kara never thought she’d have a steady boyfriend, or a serious relationship, even before she became Supergirl. Considering who she was and where she came from, it just seemed impossible. She was bulletproof. She was way stronger and faster than any human. She could fly, for God’s sake. She could never be with a normal human if she didn’t want them to find out about her abilities, or about the fact that she was Supergirl.

That was why it seemed Jimmy Olsen was a perfect choice for her. He knew who she was, and he didn’t care. He knew Clark too, and he was friends with him. He looked out for Kara even when she didn’t want that. He always treated her like a normal person. He was also charming and handsome. But the thing was, he was too perfect.

Yes, they had their ups and downs. Even before they started dating, they weren’t always on good terms. But which relationship wasn’t like that? The ups and downs were what made the relationship real. But Kara just assumed their ups were too high, and downs were too low, so it eventually broke apart. They had a messy break up, and it was probably an underestimation. Jimmy barely talked to her the two following months of their break up, and they only small talked. Of course Kara would’ve wanted to keep their friendship intact, but she didn’t have control over that.

She was the one who hurt him in the end. She was the one who failed to fall in love with him, because she didn’t realize the irreplaceable feelings buried deep down in her heart. Feelings for her best friend she only realized when she lost him.

Okay, that wouldn’t be true. She never really lost Winn. He’d always been there for her, but not just looking out with her. He stood by her. He laughed with her, cried with her, smiled with her, cursed at the job and Cat Grant with her, bought three boxes of pizza when the delivery guy gave them a weird look, got a ton of doughnuts and ice creams with her, and all the stuff she couldn’t count but was grateful for. Winn had always been a real friend, especially after he learned the Supergirl thingy. He was actually the first person she told willingly that she was Supergirl. She wanted him to know, because she knew no matter what he’d stay by her.

And he did. As he promised. He loved her, always. As a friend at first, and then a crush, and then… And then back as a friend. Only now Kara realized her feelings for her best friend were stronger than she’d even like to admit looking at the girl walking hand in hand with her best friend. Winn had mentioned he’d met a new girl, but she never thought much about it. Until he asked her if he could bring this new girlfriend to meet her.

The girl was short and blonde haired that actually looked natural even though it was almost like platinum blond. She was thin but not in a skinny way, and she was wearing a floral knee length dress. Her blonde hair was tied in a messy bun. There was a smile on her face as well that Kara doubted had ever disappeared, because she had crinkles next to her eyes for a person as young as she was. She and Winn were both radiating as they entered the workroom. Kara immediately spotted them with her super hearing, but tried so hard not to look their way. She didn’t want to see them together. She tried to put a smile on her face and stared at her computer screen for a few seconds, making sure it looked real enough. And then she turned back when she felt the couple behind her.

“Winn!” she said like she was surprised, and stood up immediately. “You didn’t say you were bringing someone over.” She looked at her best friend, trying to hide her pain behind her smile. It usually worked. But there was a flicker in Winn’s eyes, showing he didn’t buy her act. She immediately turned to the woman next to Winn. “You must be Melinda. I heard so much about you.” She extended her hand. “I’m Kara.” Melinda’s eyes widened.

“Oh, Winn mentioned you,” she said excitedly as she shook Kara’s hand. Kara made sure she didn’t crush the poor woman’s hand in hers. In the end, she did nothing wrong. In fact, she made Winn happy, which was more than Kara could ever do. She never really returned Winn’s feelings when he had them for her. So now she didn’t have the right to be angry at the woman who did.

“I’m sure he did,” Kara answered, because honestly she didn’t know what else to say. She quickly pulled up a chair next to her table. “Come, sit. It’s so nice to finally meet you.” Melinda immediately took her seat across the table from Kara, and Kara sat down as well. Winn? Well, he stayed right behind his girlfriend, one hand on the chair and the other on her shoulder, rubbing it. Melinda smiled lovingly at him, and it took everything in Kara not to purse her lips sourly. They were _happy,_ and that was all that should matter. Winn was her best friend, she should’ve been happy for them.

“I know, right?” Melinda said, leaning forward. “For a while, I thought Winn didn’t want me to meet his friends because he wasn’t thinking serious.” She pursed her lips as she glanced at Winn. “I’m just glad I finally get to come here after two months.”

 _Two months,_ Kara thought. She didn’t even know they were dating for two months. She only found out about Melinda last week. Though it wasn’t because Winn didn’t love Melinda enough. It was because he knew it’d be weird for Kara. She’d broken up with James not too long ago, and he knew the last thing she needed was to see him in a relationship, because he was a genuinely good person. But he had no idea how right he was.

“Oh, it was probably my fault,” Kara said with a fake smile. “I had just broken up with my boyfriend.” Melinda’s eyes widened immediately.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have brought that up.” Kara shook her head. The woman seemed really kind, and she felt horrible for feeling bad that Winn had an amazing girlfriend who cared about him.

“It isn’t your fault. It was a mutual decision.” _I wish_ , she thought but didn’t voice her thoughts. She didn’t want to talk about her failed relationship attempt at all. “Anyway, enough about me. Tell me more about yourself,” Kara said, trying to steer the conversation away from her. “How did you two meet?” Melinda furrowed his brows.

“Didn’t Winn tell you?” Kara’s eyes turned to Winn as Melinda started telling the story. She could barely pay attention to her, as Winn’s attention wasn’t on Melinda either. It was on her. Kara’s stomach dropped when Winn narrowed his eyes. He knew something wasn’t right with her, or that she was pretending to be happy. He always managed to see through her anyway. She turned her eyes away, looking at Melinda who seemed oblivious to the interaction between the two friends. Kara faked another smile, completely ignoring Winn, hoping he didn’t actually realize how she was feeling.

She wanted Winn to be happy. That was all she ever wanted. And she knew there was a time she could make him happy too. She just didn’t realize then she’d be happy with him as well.

* * *

Kara was sitting on the roof of the CatCo building, looking to the city. It was especially bright, considering it was a Friday night. Taking a deep breath, she lifted her head and looked at the sky. Not many stars could be seen from there, but the stars still comforted her. That was where she came from. At first, it made her sad that she’d lost her home, until she realized her true home was on earth. But now, she so wished Krypton wasn’t destroyed, her parents weren’t dead, so that she could fly over there and find comfort in their embrace. She was an alien, and today she was reminded of that once again.

“Kara.” With Winn’s voice coming from behind her, she came to her senses. Her heart started thumping as she stood up and spun around to see her best friend. He was still in his work clothes, which meant he didn’t leave.

“Winn!” she exclaimed, straightening her suit up. “What are you doing here in the middle of the night?” Winn stepped forward and into the light, even though she didn’t really need that to see him. One of his hands were in his pants’ pocket.

“I needed to talk to you. I hacked into DEO to see where you were.” His gaze was so intense that Kara couldn’t help fidgeting. She frowned.

“You know you could’ve just called me, right?” she said. Winn raised his brows.

“When you were avoiding me like hell the whole day? I wasn’t about to take my chances.” Kara had never seen Winn so serious that it caused her to take a step back.

“I wasn’t avoiding you,” Kara tried to say, but Winn totally ignored her as he continued.

“And I think I know why. It’s about Melinda, isn’t it? You haven’t been yourself since she came.” Kara literally froze with Winn’s words, and even though she tried to keep her face straight, she knew Winn saw right through her when a painful expression appeared on his face. “I’m right, aren’t I?”

“No,” she said immediately, but her voice cracked. “It’s not about her.” It was so obvious she was lying that she wanted to smack herself upside down. “It’s not like you think,” she desperately tried to save the situation. Winn laughed, but there was no humor in it.

“You acted like you couldn’t stand being around Melinda. I’m sure she didn’t notice, she’s not that kind of a person, but I did because I know you. At first I thought you didn’t like Melinda, which didn’t make sense because she was just like you in some ways. But then I realized why it really was. It was because you were jealous, weren’t you?” Kara didn’t know what to say as she opened her mouth. Nothing came out anyway. Winn had gotten it right. No, he didn’t just get it right, he hit the nail right on the head.

And Kara didn’t know how to fix it.

“Yes,” she decided to say finally. “Yes, you were right. It wasn’t about Melinda because she’s… She’s a really good person, Winn. And I’m so happy you found her.” Winn lifted his brow.

“Are you, really?” Kara couldn’t help cringing with Winn’s words. She crossed her arms in defense.

“What do you want me to say, Winn? That it bothers me? Because it does. It does bother me, but not because I think there’s anything wrong with Melinda, but because you two are perfect for each other and I…” Her voice trailed off as her cheeks started to burn. “And it reminds me of what we could’ve had.” She was so quiet that she didn’t think Winn heard it, but from the way he sucked in a sharp breath, it was evident he understood.

“You told me you didn’t want me,” he whispered. “You turned me down, and now you’re telling me…”

“I know, Winn!” she said desperately, spreading her arms. Tears glistened in her eyes. “I know I messed up, okay? I thought I didn’t care enough about you. I thought it’d be unfair for you. I just… I never realized you were gonna move on someday, and I’d lose you.” Winn blinked.

“What did you think would happen?” he asked slowly, anger draining from his voice. Kara wrapped her arms around herself as she shivered.

“I don’t know.” She took a deep breath and bit her lip. “I was being selfish. I’m sorry Winn if I made you feel like you or Melinda did something wrong. You didn’t. It’s all my fault.” Both of them didn’t say anything for a while as Kara stared at the ground and Winn stared at her. He spoke up in the end.

“You know you could’ve had me,” he whispered. “If you… If you hadn’t waited too long…” Kara pressed her lips together and shook her head. She knew. And that was what made all of this harder.

“I know. But I guess it’s too late now, isn’t it?” She already knew the answer before Winn even said a word.

“Yes. Yes, it is.”

* * *

 _I was looking for something I already had_  
_When I came back for it it was somebody else's_


	14. Battlefield - Skyeward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Ward escaped from his cell in the Providence, it's up to Skye to stop him once and for all. (Post Season 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I know it had been some time, but I was working on a multichapter Skyeward AU (its name is Shadow Preachers and the first chapter is up if you wanna read it) so it took me some time to finish this. Writing it was in my mind for some time, because the song - Battlefield - reminded me of Skyeward so much (and I have to admit, gets me teary-eyed every time I listen) but it was really hard to write it. It's an angsty fic with a non happy ending, so you've been warned. It's post season 1, so if you haven't watched it, it contains spoilers. I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Song: Battlefield by Lea Michele  
> TV Show: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  
> Fandom: Skyeward (Ward&Skye)

_Once lust has turned to dust and all that's left's held breath_  
 _Forgotten who we first met_  
 _What seemed like a good idea has turned into a battlefield_  
  
_We both know it's coming_  
 _Does illusion count for something we hide?_  
 _The surface tension's gotta break, one drop is all it takes to flood out this lie_

* * *

Skye knew as soon as the deafening alarms went off in the Providence, something was wrong. Seriously wrong. She was in her room, writing codes on the computer just to distract herself—like she always did when she had nothing else to do—when she heard the alarms. But it wasn’t the alarm that frightened her. It was Coulson’s words that came after that. “Shut the doors. Shut everything down now! The prisoner has escaped. Repeating, prisoner Grant Ward has escaped.” Her heart sank in her chest the moment she heard that name. She was avoiding it for dear God, not wanting to relive what had happened. She didn’t want to relive the moments where for her…everything fell apart

She honestly didn’t know how else to explain it.

The reason she’d…well, in a way infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D. was to find her family. Anything about them, and then track them down. And she’d found her family, just not in the way she thought. Coulson, May, Fitz, Simmons… Ward… They’d become her family. So much so that she even dropped the investigation regarding her biological parents.

Until she found out Ward was HYDRA. Until she was stabbed in the back in the worst way possible. Until what she once thought was a miracle, that she actually found her place in the world, crumpled down into unfixable pieces. She’d used to think nothing could be worse than being an orphan, being abandoned by your parents before you even met them, and not knowing why they’d left you in the first place. She was wrong. Losing your family, losing them after you _loved_ them so dearly was much worse. Because it wasn’t just Ward that he’d lost. Coulson was distant, going on missions around the world he didn’t talk about, and when he was at the base, he just locked himself in his office. May, whom Skye had started to see as a mother figure, rarely talked to her or the scientists, except their training sessions. And even then, she didn’t get personal with Skye. Always professional. Simmons was gone to who the hell knew where, abandoning a struggling Fitz who… Who was nothing like he used to be. Seeing the brilliant man struggling with almost everything that came naturally to him was too hard on Skye. And Trip? He tried. He was a specialist, he was good at pretending like nothing was wrong with the team when there clearly was. His effort wasn’t enough, though.

And Ward? He was locked in Vault D, where Skye avoided like it was hell itself, away from the team as…as he deserved. Because he was a traitor. Because he was HYDRA. Because he was a monster.

Skye honestly couldn’t think of a better word. And no matter how much she wanted the team to go back to the way it was, she knew it was impossible. They’d never be that way again, not with Coulson shutting him out, May completely avoiding talking to any of them, Simmons gone and Fitz who just couldn’t fit in, and Ward… Ward as the bad guy locked up. Well, _used to be_ locked up at least, based on what Coulson had said.

She immediately stood up with the warning and grabbed her ICER from the table, tucking a real gun in her pants just in case. And without hesitation, she ran out of her room to the entrance. She wouldn’t let Ward go. He wasn’t the man she knew. He was a monster who needed to be kept away from public for their safety. She _wouldn’t_. She once had the chance to get rid of him forever. Not even two months ago, when Mike had shot him in the chest, she could’ve let him die. She _should’ve_ let him die. But her naïve, stupid heart just couldn’t let that happen. That Skye somehow held onto the hope that maybe he’d see the right way. Maybe one day, he’d come around and be the Grant Ward she knew, her S.O., her friend, and maybe even something more.

It wasn’t happening. Not anytime soon at least. And Skye didn’t have time to wait.

She immediately started to run to the exit, trying to shut out every distraction. There was one thing in her mind, and only one thing. Ward. And keeping him from running away. _No matter what._

Before she could reach the exit, though, she stumbled into two unconscious S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. Air caught up in her throat as she stopped dead in her tracks. She couldn’t be sure if the agents were alive or not. There wasn’t any visible wounds on them, but knowing Ward and his abilities, they could easily be dead. She quickly, if not a little fearfully, checked the agents’ pulses. They were alive. Taking a relieved breath, she continued. Ward was on his way to the exit, and she needed to hurry.

But before she could make it there, gun in her hand, someone jumped in front of her, grabbing the gun from her hand and twisting her arm around. The movement and momentum was too unexpected for her that she couldn’t do anything, though she’d vaguely noticed it was Ward from the corner of her eyes. She cursed as Ward kicked her legs from under her and sent her down to her knees.

“If you make a sound, I’m gonna shoot you in the head, and this time I won’t hesitate.” His voice made Skye shiver. It was completely devoid of emotion as Ward grabbed her hair, and not softly like the times he’d kissed her.

Oh, no. Nothing close to that. And Skye immediately got rid of those thoughts.

“Then do it already,” she hissed as Ward pulled her to her feet. She could feel the barrel of the gun behind her head, yet weirdly she wasn’t scared. A couple of months ago, before the HYDRA takeover, the thought of dying would’ve terrified her. Now… Even though she didn’t want to die—she wasn’t _that_ depressed—the idea of it, leaving the world forever and not coming back, didn’t cause her stomach to coil and her knees to tremble. In fact, her steps didn’t waver as Ward pushed her to the entrance, even though her hands were up.

“I don’t want to kill you, Skye.” Ward’s voice was emotionless again, yet still something in it made Skye believe he was telling the truth. “I’d never want to hurt you.” She almost felt like jumping on him with those words. She shook her head with a hysterical laugh.

“You don’t want to hurt me? Well, guess what Ward, you did.” She couldn’t help herself as the words she’d hidden for so long tumbled out of her lips. “I believed in you. Trusted you. I thought you cared about me too, but all that time you were just playing me. Playing us.” Tears threatened her eyes, but she pushed them away harshly.

“I wasn’t playing you. Not the entire time. What we had was—“

“If you say real, I think I’m gonna scream,” Skye threatened the HYDRA agent behind him as they reached the exit. To Skye’s surprise, there were no S.H.I.E.L.D. agents there. She blinked, and in a second Ward laughed.

“Looking for your friends? Well, sorry to inform you, but I made sure all the doors are locked before I made my way to the exit. You’re not the only one good with computers.” Skye cursed internally, but didn’t let her fear show. “Now if you let me go, none of us need to get hurt.”

“I won’t,” she whispered stubbornly, shifting in her place to get comfortable. Just as she did that, something brushed her stomach, reminding of the gun tucked in her pants. Her heart stuttered, but she quickly ignored the feeling as she continued as naturally as possible. She couldn’t let Ward get even the clue about her having a gun in her pants, or else she’d lose her advantage. The young woman was getting good at fighting, being trained by the Cavalry was really helping her, yet she knew Ward had at least fifteen years of intense training in his pocket, and Skye knew how detail oriented and observant he was. One wrong move, and she’d be made, probably getting a bullet to her head.

“I’m not gonna let you walk out of here and hurt innocent people.” She gritted her teeth as Ward laughed again.

“Who says I’m gonna hurt anyone? Maybe all I want is to disappear?” Skye snorted, looking at her ex S.O. over her shoulder.

“I’m done believing your lies, Ward.” She slowly lowered her hands, getting them close to her hidden gun. “Shoot me if you want, but if you expect to escape without struggle, that’s not gonna happen.” Shutting her eyes, Skye knew she was playing a dangerous game as her fingers inched closer to the gun. She waited for the gunshot, though she was sure she’d be dead before she even heard it, but it never came. She could feel Ward’s hesitation.

A part of her knew Ward wasn’t lying. He did care about her in his own twisted way. But she also knew now that Garrett was gone, his priority was himself. And he’d do anything to save her.

Yet that hesitation was enough for Skye as the barrel of the gun pulled away from her head just for an inch. In a second she decided what to do, so that Ward couldn’t see her plan as she spun around, grabbing the gun in Ward’s hand, spinning around herself. In a second, their roles were reversed as right now, she was the one pointing the gun at Ward. She stepped away and out of Ward’s reach, yet her hands weren’t shaking as she pointed the gun at the man she once saw as her friend. She once _loved_.

Grant lifted his hands, but he didn’t seem worried as a smile pulled his lips. “You’re getting better. Training with May does you good, I see.” Skye pressed her lips together.

“I don’t want to be helpless against anyone anymore,” she said, not flinching as she put her finger on the trigger. “Go down on your knees, and put your hands behind your head.” Ward smirked as he went down. His expression told Skye that he didn’t believe she could pull the trigger.

Honestly, she wasn’t sure either. She didn’t have anything with her to unlock the doors, and she didn’t know how much time would it take the team to manage that. And she knew the more time she spent with Ward, the risk of him escaping—and possibly killing her in the process—increased.

“I don’t want to hurt you either, Ward,” she said as she took a deep breath. “But I can’t let you escape.”

“You know you need to pull the trigger to achieve that,” Ward said almost too casually. Skye lifted her chin, trying to blink away her tears. There was a reason she avoided Ward’s cell for the past few weeks. It was because no matter how many times she reminded herself that Ward was a traitor, that he killed Agent Koenig, tried to kill Fitzsimmons, and followed a monster till the end, she could still see her S.O. in his face, her friend in his eyes, and…and maybe something more in his lips, reminding her of their kisses. The feeling still hadn’t left, and his betrayal stung worse not because the terrible things he did, but because of the good things he pretended to be.

“But I think we both know you don’t have that in you, right?” Ward continued, but Skye couldn’t pay attention to him. She knew if she wanted to end it once and for all, she needed to shoot Ward. In the head. She would get away with it, too, and she doubted anyone would blame her. Yet she still couldn’t bring herself to do it as memories flooded her mind. The first time they played battleship on that table on the bus, which was the first time he complimented her.

_A compliment and a smile_ , she could remember herself saying as Ward laughed across her. It was maybe the first time she saw him smile that genuinely and carelessly. Something had pulled the stings of her heart as she couldn’t help thinking he should laugh more, because it made him look more beautiful than she had thought, but she ignored those thoughts then.

“You couldn’t shoot Quinn when you had the chance, and he was just a stranger.”

She remembered the first days they started training. _You either dedicate yourself to this, or you curl up in a ball and run_ , he’d told her. She brushed it off with a joke, as she always did back then. _How can you run if you’re curled up in a ball?_ But in the end, he’d been right. She dedicated herself to be the good S.H.I.E.L.D. agent she thought Ward was, especially after the betrayal. Yet still she couldn’t pull the trigger.

She remembered him training her how to grab the gun from the enemy. _And then_ , she remembered him saying as her back was pressed to his chest, her arm around his. Her heart had stuttered with the feel of his body, with the tight muscles along his arm and on his chest, and with her heartbeat pounding in her ears. She’d completely forgotten what she was supposed to do, but she again joked to get herself out of the uncomfortable—yet pleasurable—moment. _Then things are moving too quickly, I’m a proper Southern girl, you’ll make me untidy_. Yet that skill was what saved her life against Quinn.

All those moments, and much more, flashed in front of her eyes as Ward continued talking. “Because right now, I can see in your eyes that you don’t have what it takes.” She remembered all those compliments. Him telling her some things are meant to be. Standing by her when she was about to be kicked out of the plane. Coming for her rescue from Quinn’s place. Making her do push ups, pull ups, punches and kicks that had really fancy names Skye couldn’t remember as she complained, yet she’d used every single skill he’d taught her. Because in the end, he was a skilled S.O. He was a skilled agent. Even though he wasn’t a good one.

But those were all lies, as she now knew the truth. All that time he was pretending. All that time he was lying to their faces as he went behind their backs. _Getting the gun is one thing_ , he’d told her once. _Pulling the trigger is another_.

There was a time she didn’t have it in her, yes. There was a time she thought she could never take the kill shot. But right now, as she stared at the man who’d killed her in the worst way possible, she realized it had changed.

“You’re not gonna shoot me, Skye, because that’s just not who you are. You’re still that naïve girl who hides behind her computer, thinking she can save the world without violence, without killing, without drifting to the dark si—“ A gunshot rang around the hall, echoing on the walls as the eyes of the HYDRA agent widened. He slumped back, with the shocked look frozen on his face, blood trickling down his forehead from the bullet wound. Skye pressed her lips together as tears started streaming down her face, and the gun clattered on the ground. She inhaled shakily, her eyes glued to the dead HYDRA agent, a monster, yet still she felt hollow as she faced him.

“No, Grant, I’m not that girl anymore. Not since you’ve killed her.”

* * *

_You and I_   
_We have to let each other go_   
_We keep holding on but we both know_   
_What seemed like a good idea has turned into a battlefield_   
_Peace will come when one of us puts down the gun_   
_Be strong for both of us_   
_No please, don't run, don't run_   
_Eye to eye, we face our fears unarmed on the battlefield_


	15. Find My Way Back - Snowbarry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Barry feels hopeless after a day of crime fighting, it is up to his girlfriend, Caitlin, to comfort him.

_On my way now_  
_Don't give up on me_  
_And no one knows what_  
_What tomorrow brings_  
_These weary eyes will never rest_  
_Until they look in yours again_  
_I'm on my way now_  
_I still believe_

* * *

Caitlin knew better than to interrupt Barry when he wanted to be alone. Being the Flash wasn’t easy, and even with the powers he had, he couldn’t save everyone. Of course Barry knew that, he knew he couldn’t always win, yet knowing and actually _experiencing_ it was different. With his powers, it rarely happened, but sometimes there was a villain that was just smart enough, or strong enough, or even fast enough that things went bad. And no matter how much Caitlin tried to be there for her boyfriend in those kinds of situations, there usually wasn’t anything she could do to comfort him.

Especially in a day like that one, where Barry blamed himself for the explosion in the hospital and…and those dead nurses and the patient. Even though there was no way he could’ve spotted the bomb before it blew up. Still, she knew Barry blamed himself for it, for not being able to save them having the powers he has.

That was the problem with superpowers, Caitlin believed. With all the good you could do with them, there was a flip side. A normal person in Barry’s situation would’ve probably thought there wasn’t anything he or she could’ve done. They would feel bad, of course, but guilt was a different thing. When you did have powers, and you still failed and people got hurt, you wondered if you could’ve saved them maybe if you did something differently. It ate you away.

Caitlin could see that in Barry’s eyes sometimes. It hurt her, of course, yet he usually stayed silent about that and the look in his eyes would disappear in at most a day, so she never really asked about his feelings, not wanting to remind him of them. She was planning on doing exactly the same this time, if it hadn’t been close to midnight and Barry still hadn’t come down from the building’s roof. She was waiting for him to come down around the cortex, working on the chemicals, tidying up the med-bay and generally walking around the corridors, but she was worried sick. Barry had never done something like that.

So when the clock hit exactly 12 a.m., she couldn’t take it anymore. Wrapping her jacket around her dress, she made her way to the rooftop, her heart pounding in her chest. The door was open. Taking a deep breath, she pushed it slowly, trying not to bother Barry. Even the quiet creak of the door, though, sounded too loud to her ears. She cringed as she stepped out into the chilly fall air. The sudden drop in the temperatures was an indication that summer was definitely over.

“Barry?” she whispered as her eyes found her boyfriend, standing at the edge of the door, staring at the city. Even though it was late, the lights were still shining over the city, swirls of red and yellow and orange, splashes of light blue and white, dancing on the buildings, over the water, and up in the sky, creating a light show. As a curious scientist, Caitlin liked to look at the stars and their patterns, but she had to admit, Central City looked beautiful at night. Not overwhelming like Las Vegas or New York, just enough of light and darkness, of short and tall buildings balancing out each other, and water breaking the illumination and giving the eyes a rest.

However, Barry looked like he noticed none of that as he looked at the night sky. He looked distracted, his hands gripping the railing tightly. Caitlin slowly walked next to him, trying not to scare him off.

“Barry, it’s getting late,” she continued, stepping next to the young man. Although Barry still hadn’t looked at her, she could see his face more clearly, and she realized tears were staining his cheeks and falling down. He didn’t even bother to wipe them off. That stuttered Caitlin’s heart. A part of her wanted to wrap her arms around Barry, pull him in her embrace and tell him everything was going to be okay, but she knew better than that. Whatever had happened, she couldn’t change it. She could just help Barry through it.

She waited for him to speak for a while without making a sound, just standing next to him. A minute passed, and then two, and then when Caitlin guessed it had been five minutes and she was about to give up, Barry turned her eyes to him.

“The bomb wasn’t hidden, Caitlin,” he whispered, his voice cracking in the middle of the sentence. “I should’ve seen it.” Caitlin shook her head as she put her hand on Barry’s shoulder.

“You were just one guy, Barry, and you were trying to find the assailants. No one blames you.” Barry pressed his lips together.

“I was one guy who can run faster than the speed of sound. And you’re wrong when you say nobody blames me. Those nurses’ families do. The man… The man’s family do, and they have the right. I wasn’t fast _enough_.” Caitlin grimaced. She knew the situation was bad if Barry thought _he_ wasn’t fast enough. It reminded her all those times with Zoom and the Reverse Flash, and Barry losing his confidence in his powers _and_ in himself. For the last few months they started dating, and even before that, she did everything she could to make sure that didn’t happen again.

It was hurtful to see she had failed.

“Barry, I know me saying this won’t help, but even you can’t save everyone.” She put her hand on Barry’s shoulder, hoping he wouldn’t push it away. He didn’t. Instead, he leaned on his girlfriend’s hand, accepting the support. A little smile pulled Caitlin’s lips, but it disappeared immediately with his expression.

“But I have to. I have to save everyone, because… This city see me as their hope, Caitlin. What happens if I fail and let them down? I’m their symbol. The Flash. The man who saved Central City. I can’t slip up. I can’t let these kinds of things happen again.” Caitlin shook her head.

“You’re just a man. Like them. You can make mistakes too.” Barry looked at Caitlin desperately.

“They don’t see me as a man.” Caitlin lifted her chin defiantly.

“Well, you want to know how I see you, Barry Allen?” she asked. He didn’t answer, but he didn’t exactly try to stop her either, so she continued. “I see you as the man who accidentally got these amazing powers, and instead of using it to get everything he wanted, he used it to help and protect other people.” Barry shook his head again desperately. The light behind his eyes was gone as he stared at the city, his hands on the railing.

“What good does it do if I can’t even spot a _bomb_? Their deaths are my fault.” Caitlin bit her lip. She was at a loss of words, she didn’t know what she could say to make Barry feel better. He’d blame himself. He always did. Yet this time it was worse than she’d ever seen. Something must have gone terribly wrong to cause this kind of reaction in Barry.

“What happened there, Barry?” Caitlin asked. Barry dropped his chin, which was answer enough that something had gone terribly wrong. “It isn’t the first time there were casualties. And when villains are concerned, there always will be even with your powers. So what happened?” Barry didn’t answer for a minute.

“I saw the bomb go off,” he whispered finally. Caitlin frowned. She’d guessed that much, but she still couldn’t see how it was any different than other times. But before she could ask the question, Barry continued. “I saw the bomb go off in _slow motion_ , Caitlin.”

“What are you talking about?” Caitlin asked with a gasp, already afraid of where this was going.

“I was… I was right outside the hospital room,” Barry started telling the story. “Trying to get the people to safety. I was right _outside_ , Caitlin, when I heard it go off.” He shook his head, turning away from his girlfriend. Caitlin was truly speechless. All the words had died off on her tongue. She didn’t want to hear the rest. She wanted to shut her ears, curl up in a corner and stay there for the whole night. She didn’t know how to comfort Barry, and that was a heavy burden to carry.

“And by then it was too late,” Barry whispered. “I was standing right outside the window, and I saw it all. How the fire spread. How the particles flew around. I saw the faces of the nurses. One of them was staring right into my eyes with shock splashed on her face. She didn’t even have time to realize what was going on when the flames swallowed her and killed her instantly. And all I could do was run away and save my life, because I was too late, because the bomb had already gone off and killed them before I could even register what was happening, and I saw it all in slow motion. I left them there to die to save _myself_. How is _that_ being a hero?”

“Barry…” Caitlin whispered just to say something. Even though Barry was right in front of her—albeit his back to her—she felt like there were miles between them. “I don’t know what to say,” she said honestly. Barry shook his head. Even though Caitlin couldn’t see his face, she was quite sure his expression was a mixture of pain, guilt, and shame.

“Because there’s _nothing_ to say.” Caitlin took a deep breath, stepping forward and in front of Barry. He seemed surprised when he saw her, yet he didn’t say anything. He didn’t even move.

“Yes, there is. I’m just not that good at comforting.” That cracked up a small smile on Barry’s face, but it disappeared before Caitlin could congratulate herself for that. “So I’m gonna be blunt. You are a hero, Barry Allen, and that is not just my belief, that is a fact. You stopped hundreds of criminals, saved at least twice as many people, and risked your life for this city, powers or not, more times than I can count. That makes you a hero.”

“But—“ Barry tried to cut in but Caitlin stopped him.

“No, let me finish. What happened at the hospital today… Did people die? Yes. Could you have save them? I don’t know, and there isn’t really a way to know that if you’re not willing to go back in time and check it, which I really advise against.” Barry snort-laughed as both of them remembered the horrible events of “Flashpoint” a couple of years ago. Nobody wanted to relive _that_.

“Did you do everything in your power to prevent that?” Caitlin continued softly, stopping for a second. “I’m gonna go with a yes, Barry, because I _know_ you. If there was even a slight chance of saving them, you’d have taken it. So don’t beat yourself over something that wasn’t your fault. I’m not downgrading what happened there, but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad hero, or not a hero at all.” Stepping forward, she grabbed her boyfriend’s hand and squeezed it. “I believe in you, Barry. With all my heart. I’m just asking you to do the same.” _Please_ , she thought. She hated to see Barry like this, hopeless, when usually he was the one who brought hope to the team when all others were desperate.

Barry turned his eyes to the ground, looking at his feet. He didn’t say anything for a while, long enough for Caitlin to start giving up. She was just about to try one last time when Barry grabbed both of her hands and held them tightly.

“Okay. Yeah. I know,” he whispered, looking at Caitlin’s eyes directly for the first time the whole night. “I just… It’s…”

“Hard?” Caitlin suggested. With an exasperated smile, Barry nodded. “I understand. But Barry, you don’t have to go through it alone.” This time, Barry’s smile were more real. Wrapping his arms around Caitlin, he pulled her in his embrace and rested his chin on her head.

“Trust me, Caitlin, I know. I _know_.” That was all the confirmation Caitlin needed to know that they were going to be okay, and together.

* * *

_There's nothing that I wouldn't do_  
_I'll find my way back to you_


	16. Safe & Sound - Olicity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity goes to Oliver's house in the middle of the night when she doesn't hear from him in two days. What she finds might not be what she expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> I'm sorry this has taken too long, but the last two weeks had been my exam weeks and I could barely lift my head from studying. And it had also been longer than I initially expected, more than 3500 words (WOW!) so I hope you like it! 
> 
> Song: Safe & Sound by Taylor Swift  
> TV Show: Arrow  
> Fandom: Olicity (Oliver&Felicity)

_I remember tears streaming down your face_   
_When I said, "I'll never let you go."_   
_When all those shadows almost killed your light_   
_I remember you said, "Don't leave me here alone,"_   
_But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight_

* * *

Felicity’s knuckles hurt because of banging harshly on the door, yet there was still no answer. Yes, it was almost 1 a.m., but she knew for a fact that Oliver didn’t sleep much, and even if he _did_ sleep, he was a light sleeper. If he was inside, he definitely would’ve heard the knocking.

“For God’s sake, Oliver, why the hell aren’t you answering?” she mumbled to herself as she took a bobby pin from her hair. The strand fell over her eyes, yet though she didn’t really mind as she knelt down. “I swear to God, when I find you, I’m gonna kill you for making me kneel down in this skirt and break into your house.” She stopped for a second. “And for making me worry about you.” _Of course if you’re not already dead_ , she thought yet didn’t say it out-loud. She couldn’t go there. Oliver must be alive. He’d survived so many things that he couldn’t just be…gone. Besides, he was the Green Arrow. He would be able to protect herself.

Yet the fact that she hadn’t heard from him for more than two days did make her wonder if she was right about that. Even the new team was growing restless. Oliver had been training Rene, Evelyn, Rory and Curtis for two months now with Diggle’s help, they were getting pretty good, but they still wasn’t used to go out there without Oliver at least knowing about it. And Diggle had told her not to worry, that Oliver would turn up when he was ready, but Felicity couldn’t just shake the feeling that something was wrong. _Terribly_ wrong.

And now it was up to _her_ to find Oliver.

The lock gave a click sound and opened, and Felicity silently thanked God as she stepped in. Oliver’s new home was small compared to their old loft, where she was currently living in, but at least he wasn’t staying at the Arrow Cave anymore.

“Oliver?” she whispered as she turned on the lights, looking around the living room of the studio flat. It was nicely decorated, with a green couch right in the middle, a black rug in the floor right in front of it with a glass coffee table over it, a television on the other side of the room with two ferns on each side, a tall lamp on the corner and a counter right by the wall. The kitchen was an open kitchen with two counters in black and again, green, and except one or two takeout boxes, there wasn’t much around it. There was Oliver’s coat on the chair beside the kitchen counter, and his t-shirt over the couch, yet there was nothing else.

That was when she noticed the bloody footprints leading to Oliver’s room.

Her heart leaped in her chest as she froze with fear for a second. Those couldn’t really _be_ bloody footprints, right? She knelt down again, slowly, cursing under her breath, to look at one of the footprints.

It was blood. Not fresh.

“Oh my God, Oliver, what did you do?” she muttered as she made her way to Oliver’s bedroom, following the footprints. Fear had gripped her heart, holding it tightly, as if someone actually had taken it out and was holding it in his hands. She kicked open the door, her breath coming out as pants, and her hand slammed to the wall beside her to find the light switch. The light flickered on in painful three seconds as she stared into the darkness, and then she was momentarily blinded by the bright white light.

That moment passed in a heartbeat, though. Felicity found herself facing Oliver’s little tidy bedroom. He _always_ kept everything tidy. He never really told her—or Diggle—why, he kept his secrets close to his heart, yet Felicity suspected he wasn’t like that before…

Well, before the shipwreck. Before the _island_.

They still rarely discussed those times, though, so what exactly happened on that island was anybody’s guess.

Those thoughts immediately disappeared from Felicity’s head when she saw the figure lying down on the bed, though. Her mouth dropped open as she looked at Oliver, sprawled over the bed with a whiskey bottle on the counter and…

Was that a _bloodstain_ on the blanket?

“Oliver!” she couldn’t help yelling, rushing over to Oliver’s side and kneeling down, her promise to kill Oliver for making her kneel down long forgotten. Her hand immediately went to Oliver’s pulse.

He was alive. Of course he was alive.

“God, Oliver, what happened to you?” she muttered mostly to herself as she grasped his shoulder. She only needed to shake him slightly before he opened his eyes and straightened up immediately, his hand shooting forward to grab Felicity’s arm. _He never lets his guard down, even when he’s drunk and sleeping_ , Felicity thought. It would’ve been a little more believable if Oliver, who never missed his target with arrows—or with any sort of weapon—missed her wrist with a couple of inches and had almost fell down if he hadn’t been able to hold onto the bed. He blinked, trying to steady himself.

“Felicity?” he whispered in a strained voice. Felicity forced a smile for his sake and her hand went up to his cheek. She pushed his damp hair back. Luckily, it was only sweat and not alcohol.

“Yeah, it’s me,” she said, realizing how ridiculous it sounded. Taking a deep breath, she shook her head. “Oliver, what happened?”

Oliver didn’t answer for a couple of seconds, just stared at Felicity. There was a sheen of vulnerability in his eyes, pain and…and brokenness that Felicity had never seen before, not even when Moira was killed in front of Oliver or when he’d lost Laurel, and basically almost all of the rest of his team with her.

He was lost, yet this time, Felicity had no idea why.

“What are you doing here?” Oliver finally asked, completely ignoring her question. The broken look on his face was gone, replaced by a bored and sleepy mask. If Felicity didn’t know better, she might’ve believed it, but she’d known Oliver more than enough to know what was act and what wasn’t, no matter how good an actor he was.

“What am I doing here? Do you seriously need to ask me that?” Clearing her throat, she forced herself to soften her voice. Standing up, she sat on the bed, right next to Oliver. “We haven’t heard from you for two days. Not since you went to that mysterious mission of yours.” At least Felicity assumed it was a mission, and not just a trip he took with his sister from the way he looked.

Oh, and let’s not forget the blood on the bed and bloody footprints around the house. Something _must’ve_ gone wrong.

“It was just a trip,” Oliver insisted as he swung his legs down from the bed. “I told you. I needed some alone time with my sister.” He stood up before Felicity could stop him, and clutched his stomach. His shirt rode up, revealing the huge bandage wrapped around his waist. Felicity gasped, standing up after Oliver.

“Is that why you bled on the bed and you have a huge bandage around your stomach?” she said as she followed him to the living room. “Or you have bloody footprints in your living room?” Oliver shrugged like it was no big deal, yet there was tautness visible in his shoulders.

“We…encountered some trouble. I’m the mayor of Star City, Felicity, where no mayor has ever known peace.” He looked over his shoulder at Felicity with a easy grin on his face. “You want something to drink?” he asked as he went into the kitchen.

“You’re dodging my questions like a boy playing dodge ball.” She stopped for a second. “Not that you’re bad at it, but still.”

“I’m no—“ Oliver started, but Felicity cut him as she threw herself on one of the kitchen stools.

“Coffee.” Oliver blinked.

“What?”

“I want coffee. Black. God knows I need it.” She pushed her hair back as a small smile played on Oliver’s lips. She gawked at him. “What?”

“Nothing. I just missed you.” Felicity’s heart fluttered in her chest as her cheeks heated. Trying to hide how much those three, short words affected her, she cleared her throat and crossed her arms.

“Flattery won’t stop me from questioning you,” she warned him as he dropped a cup of coffee in front of her, and another for him. He sat down across her.

“I didn’t think it would.” He took a long, slow sip from his coffee as Felicity waited for him to say something. Finally, he started to speak. “You were right. I was out on a mission. With Thea.” Felicity’s shoulders dropped as she frowned with anger. She knew Oliver could be reckless and over-confident at times, yet she wouldn’t think he’d keep a mission secret from _her_ , if not the team. It wasn’t even entirely about trust, even though he had Thea with him, it was still a dangerous thing to go out on a mission _alone_.

“God, Oliver, you’re so stupid.” Resigned, Felicity shook her head. “Why didn’t you tell me? I _could’ve_ helped you,” she insisted.

“I didn’t want to—“

“If you say involve you, I swear to God I’m gonna pour this coffee down your head,” she cut in, raising her brows. “I am already involved, and it’s not like I’m new to this.” She stopped for a second. “Was it because you didn’t trust me?” Felicity so hoped that wasn’t the case. She trusted Oliver wholeheartedly, and she believed he trusted her wholeheartedly, yet one could never be sure of it with Oliver. And she wanted him to trust her. Not only that he was her best friend, he’d also been somewhat more to her at some point, and he even might be something more to her ri—

She stopped that train of thought before it had the chance to complete. She so wasn’t ready to go there. Not yet.

“No, of course not. Why would you think that?” Oliver said dumbfoundedly. He seemed so surprised by the fact that Felicity could ever think he didn’t trust her that it made her feel bad. She cleared her throat.

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” she said softly, a part of her afraid of the answer. Oliver took a deep breath.

“It was about William. My son. I-I thought it’d remind you of…” his voice trailed off. Felicity straightened up with his words. Of all the things she expected him to say, that wasn’t one of them. Not that she didn’t expect it to be something big, but she wasn’t bothered by the fact that Oliver had a son. She never was. In fact, if the boy had lost her mother, she’d be glad to take care of him.

She’d made a rash decision when she broke up with Oliver. She thought she couldn’t stand the lies and secrets anymore, but their life was a big secret anyway. She should’ve been more understanding.

It was too late anyway.

“Is he okay?” she asked immediately to show Oliver she wasn’t bothered by William anymore instead of lashing out. And she really was worried about the kid.

“Yeah, he is. Now. He’d been kidnapped and Samantha couldn’t find her. It’s all okay now.” Felicity bit her lip. It sure as hell didn’t _look_ okay.

“Then why did I find you bled out on your bed contemplating on how worse life could get?” Oliver shot her a glare.

“I wasn’t contemplating on something bad.”

“Fine, then you were thinking about it,” Felicity insisted. Oliver didn’t answer at first. “Come on, Oliver, you wouldn’t be here, leaving the team and the city alone if something big hadn’t happened.”

“Samantha is engaged,” Oliver blurted out finally. Felicity frowned. At first, she couldn’t see how Samantha having a fiancé would bother him, she was from his distant past and Felicity was sure he didn’t have feelings for her anymore. It hit him in a couple of seconds.

“It’s William, isn’t it?” she asked quietly. Oliver chuckled, but there was nothing humorous about it.

“You were always perceptive,” he muttered under his breath, and then sighed. “He sees the guy as…as his dad.” Felicity pressed her lips together. There was a tightness in her chest, as if someone had taken a hold of her heart and was squishing it. She shook her head.

“I’m so sorry, Oliver,” she said, knowing how lame it sounded. Yet what else could she have said? Was there really anything one could say to make _this_ better? Oliver had sent his son away to protect him, making the ultimate sacrifice any parent would struggle to make, yet now the boy was seeing someone else as his father. The worst part wasn’t even that. Felicity was sure if Oliver was given the chance, he’d be a great father. “I wish there was something I could’ve done.” Oliver smiled sadly.

“It wasn’t your fault. It was mine. I sent him away, I don’t have the right to be sad that he actually has a father now.” Tears welled up in Felicity’s eyes with his desperate voice, like what he did was irredeemable. She shook her head.

“That’s where you’re wrong. You do have that right, Oliver.” She reached over the counter and grabbed his hand, threading her fingers through his and locking their hands. Oliver stared at them for a long while as she spoke. “He’s your son. And I know you would’ve chosen to be with him if you thought he would be safer _and_ happier with you.” Silence stretched for what felt like minutes before Oliver lifted his eyes. There was a sheen of vulnerability in them that Felicity hadn’t seen for a long time now as tears filled them. He swallowed hard.

“I just feel like I’m never gonna get the chance to have a family, or be a father. What I do will always put them in danger, and no matter what I want I can’t just stop being the Green Arrow and leave this city alone to criminals, or let innocent people die. It’s… It’s selfish.” Felicity bit her lip so hard that she almost tasted blood. She had to blink several times to get rid of the tears in her eyes, yet somehow new ones always replaced them. What could she tell Oliver? That it wasn’t true? That he would get the chance to have a family? She knew it would be too difficult, if not impossible.

“I broke up with Billy,” she suddenly blurted out. She didn’t know why, she just wanted to change the subject and erase the lost look from Oliver’s face, and her brain hadn’t worked properly again when she needed it to. Her cheeks heated immediately. “Oh my God, you shouldn’t have heard that. You really didn’t need to hear that.”

Oliver’s gaze shot up suddenly with her words, widening with shock. “What?” he asked. Felicity pressed her lips together as she forced out a laugh, and took a huge gulp from her coffee.

“Nothing. I mean, obviously it’s not nothing, but it’s nothing you should be worried about. It’s my problem, and you certainly have a lot on your plate anyway, and I should’ve kept my mouth—“ Oliver cut off her babble by holding her hand tightly. Felicity’s voice stammered off as she stared at his hand. Silence stretched for a couple of moments before Oliver spoke.

“Your problem is my problem, Felicity. You should know that.” Pressing her lips together, Felicity nodded, not being able to find her voice for the first time that night. “How did it happen?”

“You asked me if my relationship was real. A couple of weeks ago,” she started. Oliver nodded slightly. “I’ve been trying to figure that out ever since…then. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized I was forcing myself to think it was real. Of course I enjoyed being with him, he was a good guy, but I didn’t love him.” _Not in the way I loved you_ , she thought, and even though she didn’t say it out loud she made sure she used the past tense. The unsaid words lingered between them.

“I’m sorry.” Oliver’s words were so sincere that it made Felicity’s heart flutter. Not only that, but the fact that Oliver said them and meant it even though he still loved Felicity… It somehow mattered so much more to her than if Oliver was, say, Diggle. Not that the two were the same to her, of course.

They should be, though. They should be the same. They both were her friends. She just seemed to be incapable of seeing Oliver as just a…friend.

“You have nothing to be sorry of. It’s really okay,” she said and smiled to show Oliver that she really was okay and she wasn’t faking it. “He wasn’t the one making me happy,” she continued without being able to shut herself up. The logical side of her brain was yelling at her to close her mouth, to get up and walk out, to leave, because it wasn’t right to be in Oliver’s house after 1 a.m. no matter how close friends they were, because there would always be this relationship they both weren’t able to let go lurking around, threatening to shatter that friendship she worked so hard to build. She knew if she stayed more, things could go wrong, so wrong, yet her body had a mind of her own as she continued.

“Being with you… I mean, being with you _and_ the team in the Arrow Cave, stopping criminals, saving people, that’s who I really am. That’s what makes me happy. I should never have forced that relationship when I already had what I wanted.” Oliver’s lips parted with her words, yet Felicity was unable to look at him. Her heart was stammering in her chest, begging to get out, and she wanted nothing to run behind the couch, crouch down in a ball and hide.

When she finally lifted her head, she realized how close Oliver was to her. There were merely a couple of inches between them, and Oliver was slowing that gap pretty slowly. His eyes were on Felicity, as if to see if she would pull back and break the moment. And she should have, she should’ve stopped him and pulled back, yet she stayed. She stayed and just waited for Oliver to kiss her. No matter how wrong it was, she wanted it, and in the middle of the night, after worrying about Oliver for a day, she just didn’t have the strength to pull back.

When Oliver’s lips met hers, it was like sparks of electricity and fire was injected into her bloodstream, travelling around her body, sending tingles right down her spine and all over her arms and legs. She closed her eyes after a second, letting herself loose under his lips. She missed it. Oh, she missed it so badly and hadn’t even realized it until now, until she felt his lips closing around hers. It was a soft kiss, not forcing anything, slow and patient. It almost ended too quickly when Oliver pulled back. She opened her eyes, afraid of what she would see in Oliver’s eyes. There was doubt in them, and question marks, but those weren’t what Felicity noticed. Hope. There was _hope_ in Oliver’s eyes, hope that had been absent for some time now.

“We shouldn’t have…” she started, yet she couldn’t finish the sentence as Oliver pressed a finger on her lips to shut her up. She sucked in a sharp breath, trying to get her heart and body together. How could just one touch of Oliver’s fingers could shatter her and pull her together at the same time?

“Don’t say that,” he almost begged. When Felicity stayed silent, he continued. “One dinner. That’s all I’m asking. Give me one dinner, one more chance. If it doesn’t work, you can walk away and I won’t force you. I promise. But… But give me this. Please.” _Please_. He’d said please. Felicity suddenly felt like her lungs were too small. She couldn’t breathe. There wasn’t enough oxygen, or there was too much, because she felt like she was floating in the air and falling down into a big black hole at the same time. She couldn’t get any words out, so she nodded. How could she say no when Oliver was begging her with those beautiful big eyes, with that hope behind them?

A smile tugged at Oliver’s lips as he pulled back. “Thank you,” he said hoarsely. Felicity almost laughed, but she didn’t because she didn’t want to ruin this beautiful moment. _Real_ moment. Her heart was still stuttering in her chest as she got up to leave a couple of minutes later.

She didn’t know where the date with Oliver would go. He’d broken her heart before with his lies, yet in a way she understood him. She’d forgiven her mother for lying to her. She couldn’t just hold a grudge to Oliver forever when obviously she still couldn’t forget her. When she felt more comfortable with him than anyone else. When whatever they had felt more real than anything she had, or could have in the future, with anyone else.

Oliver had asked her if her relationship with her ex was real. She knew it wasn’t before, but now she was even surer about it. It couldn’t be real, because nothing compared to how real she felt with Oliver. _Nothing_.

* * *

_Just close your eyes_   
_The sun is going down_   
_You'll be alright_   
_No one can hurt you now_   
_Come morning light_   
_You and I'll be safe and sound_

**Author's Note:**

> If you have a specific song and/or couple request, just leave a comment, and I'll do my best :). It'll be better if the song fit the couple, but I can always write an AU.


End file.
